Reflection – Page 2 – True North Missionaries Journal

The Zombie In Us

I have a thing for zombies! And that would still be an understatement.

I love watching zombie movies (I am Legend, Night of the Living Dead, Zombie Land, etc). Watching zombie series (The Walking Dead). Reading zombie comics (The Walking Dead). Playing zombie related games like Plant Vs. Zombies and Left For Dead. I actually bought Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 because of the zombie game.

I am fascinated by them. In fact, if the world ended, I’d prefer a zombie apocalypse more than anything.

So when Tito Melo Villaroman, one of my favorite speakers of all time, shared to us in our FTPW Trainee SHOUT that Warm Bodies was a good movie, I was intrigued to say the least. Since that time however, I never really had the chance to watch the movie until now.

If you haven’t watched the movie, go and watch it before you read this. I’m not sure how this will go but I may write some spoilers. I might. Don’t say I did not warn you.

In case you haven’t noticed, we live in a zombie world. People are so engrossed in their busy day-to-day lives that they go through life as – your guess is correct – zombies. We go from one place to the next, looking for something that we think may bring us life, money, fame, power, women, pleasure, etc – in zombie terms – brainz. Only to find out that our consumption of brainz follows the Law of Marginal Utility.

The Law of Marginal Utility states that the pleasure we derive from our consumption of a certain product (in this case: money, fame, power, glory, pleasure (drinking, drugs, and sex…etc)) is on a constant and significant decline. The cycle then becomes vicious, we consume more looking for that initial high, only to find out that it’s no longer there, so we consume it more. Hence the zombies, or in the movie’s term – turn from corpses to boneys.

The world likes to present to us that we are zombies that in fact we live only for the brainz. That without it we would die. Eventually we reach a point that it strips us of what we were meant to be – alive. We then become a legit boney.

Spoiler Alert – No seriously, this is not only a movie spoiler alert but a real life legit spoiler alert as well. In a good way!

But the movie, as it is in real life, shows us a beautiful inexplicable reality. That it is not about the brainz, that the world would like you to believe. There is something more. And that more is love.

The main character, R, yes it’s R, finds himself in the midst of his brains-eating-activity – love. He did not understand it at first, but he went through with it. Why, because he found something that did not make sense but it brought him true satisfaction – his restlessness of being a zombie for years found solace in something beyond him, something beyond his zombie-fied self. And that something was someone and that someone was love. That love eventually changed him enough to bring him back to life.

R’s insatiable hunger for brainz was made full by love. Real love. In the movies it was Julie. In real life it is Him.

The truth is, love, meets us right where we are, while we are eating brainz. When we are busy in our drunkenness, in the midst of our use of drugs, in our use of women (or men) for our sexual “needs”, in our hunger for power in the workplace, fame in our talents, our strategies of making money at the expense of others and the other countless “necessities” that we deem as brainz to keeps us alive.

Love meets us in the moment when somebody gently taps us and reminds us to go back to Church. Love meets us in the moment when somebody does a random act of kindness to us even if it was inconvenient for that person. Love meets us when at the times we are low and spends time with us. Love meets us and shakes us to wake us up from our brainz binge.

The world will tell you otherwise. It will say go back to whatever that made you “happy”. Go back to eating brainz. It will get angry and tell you you are wrong. That you need to ascribe to their standards. That you belong to them and they to you. That you are one with them. And it will be an uphill battle!

Sometimes it may seem that all is lost. But it’s not. Why, because love fights for us. Love, in fact, will journey with us until we are truly and fully converted back to who we are really meant to be! Alive! Love has triumphed and it will always triumph! So don’t be afraid to take the plunge, we are meant to live for so much more than brainz, we are meant to live for, in, and with love! We are meant to live! We are meant to love!

So for those who are actually already living, don’t be afraid to journey with us who are still trying to find love. Meet us where we are. Journey with us. Enflesh the Love that is Him, and incarnate what is true. Bring us back to life.

For those of us who have found love but is still leagues away from being truly alive, don’t worry. Like R, our journey with love will be an instrument for change in others like us. Our journey with love will become an invitation for others to journey with love as well. Our yes to the invitation to love becomes an act of witnessing. To be and bring love wherever we are.

May the lives of Saints Peter and Paul inspire us to say yes to love and be fully consumed by it. May their conversion to being fully alive from the death of Peter’s denial and Paul’s persecution give us hope that nothing and no one is truly far enough from love that they are lost forever. May the Sacred Heart of Jesus have mercy on us. Amen.

The original cast of warm bodies. Saints Peter and Paul. — The original cast of warm bodies

Saints Peter and Paul, pray for us.

FOB

Respect for the human person considers the other “another self.”

CCC 1944

We have long used FOB to label a person who is not up to par to our own standards. Not up to par to the level of dressing up, to the level of our use of the english language, even to a level of not being cultured enough.

The question is, when have our standards suddenly become the standard in determining a person? Isn’t the standard Genesis 1:27? That because we are men and women made in the image and likeness of God, every person is a living and breathing image and likeness of God.

Ergo, the labels we use should then proclaim this true standard – we call each other brothers and sisters. For it holds the person up, instead of down. We then not only profess and declare, but more importantly live out the truth and bear witness to the claim that we are made in the image and likeness of God.

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Canticle of Brother Sun and Sister Moon of St. Francis of Assisi

Most High, all-powerful, all-good Lord, All praise is Yours, all glory, all honour and all blessings.

To you alone, Most High, do they belong, and no mortal lips are worthy to pronounce Your Name.

Praised be You my Lord with all Your creatures, especially Sir Brother Sun,
Who is the day through whom You give us light.
And he is beautiful and radiant with great splendour,
Of You Most High, he bears the likeness.

Praised be You, my Lord, through Sister Moon and the stars,
In the heavens you have made them bright, precious and fair.

Praised be You, my Lord, through Brothers Wind and Air,
And fair and stormy, all weather’s moods,
by which You cherish all that You have made.

Praised be You my Lord through Sister Water,
So useful, humble, precious and pure.

Praised be You my Lord through Brother Fire,
through whom You light the night and he is beautiful and playful and robust and strong.

Praised be You my Lord through our Sister, Mother Earth
who sustains and governs us, producing varied fruits with coloured flowers and herbs.
Praise be You my Lord through those who grant pardon for love of You and bear sickness and trial.

Blessed are those who endure in peace, By You Most High, they will be crowned.

Praised be You, my Lord through Sister Death,
from whom no-one living can escape. Woe to those who die in mortal sin! Blessed are they She finds doing Your Will.

No second death can do them harm. Praise and bless my Lord and give Him thanks,
And serve Him with great humility.

Reminded.

Today ends my 5 day trip to New York City. Time well spent with family. It’s been years, eight to be exact, since I last saw my aunt’s family who lives in New York City. This was planned way before I actually went for Full TIme Pastoral Work, that my family already booked their work off since last year.

Right before the trip, I already had doubts concerning its timing considering its right in the middle of the True North Conference season preparation. But now as I travel back to GTA and catch up with all the things that have been happening since I left, I am reminded of that this trip was the reason why I am in the mission in the first place.

I am called to be a missionary – a family evangelizer – through the community of Couples for a serving in its youth ministry, CFC-Youth. God called me to answering the call of the vision of CFC of families in the Holy Spirit renewing the face of the earth and take a very active part in it. While my calling takes me far away from my own family who lives in Calgary, and I am based in the Greater Toronto Area. I must never lose sight that the mission of building the Church of the home always starts and ends in my own home. It is through them that God called me to mission work, it is through them that I draw strength in mission, it is through them that my own intentions are purified, it is through them that my inspiration is placed upon. It is through them that my missionary zeal and passion is tested. It is through them that my faith, hope, and joy is tested; and more importantly affirmed.

As I go back to Canada, which is a few hours away, I take away with me a renewed conviction and affirmation that I am in the right path. When I said YES to the Lord, I did not only say yes to the renewal of families I will be serving – but more importantly, I also said to the renewal of my own family.

Come Holy Spirit, renew the face of the earth. Come Holy Spirit.

Happy 32nd Anniversary Couples For Christ!

Wanderlust

I have this unfathomable love for airports and for traveling. I love looking at maps and globes. I get giddy over every customs stamp that gets added to my passport. I love stamps. I adore airplanes (hence my alias paperairplanedreams). Within the past 24 months I have been to more cities and countries than I could care to count. I suffer from wanderlust.

I was “planted” and rooted in PH, but cultivated in Toronto. That really pushed me to have this hardly home but always reppin‘ mentality. We moved quite a lot growing up so I could never really appreciate where I was. Even though we’ve rooted ourselves in Mississauga for a while now, the child in me was so used to relocating that I never realized how hard it was for me to be present in the here and now. It was so easy for me to love every other destination, yet so challenging for me to see the beauty in where I already was.

It affected the way I approached my spiritual life. It became some sort of hide & seek game; God was at my next travel destination. God was two plane rides away. God was five cities to the south and ten cities to the north. God was a twenty-six hour bus ride or a five hour drive. God was in the middle of the ocean, on top of a mountain, or beneath at the caves. God was everywhere to me but here. At home.

Then he slapped my hand, figuratively of course. He used the same voice I use when I reprimand my kindergarten students- firm but loving.

There is no need to search for God because He meets us right where we are. God doesn’t meet us halfway, He meets us right where we are. God is in the people I interact with everyday. God is in the youth I serve with and serve for. God is with the students I teach. God is with my family. God is with my friends. God is in the air I breathe, the sky that embraces me outside, the sun that illuminates my path, the rain that touches my skin, and the ground that catches my feet every, single, morning. God is in me.

You cannot search for what has already been found.

His lesson: it is not in the changing of locations that you will come to know me and my works. Rather it is in the changing of your hearts and its posture that you will be oriented back to me. That you will come to see my love, to know my love and be my love.

I will meet you right where you are.
I will love you where you are.

Remain in me, just as I remain in you.

The Giver!

I will serve the Lord when He gives me “X”!

X = Being a favourable situation, person, object, grades, timetable, salary, co-workers, bosses, etc

How many times have I heard this in one-on-ones, in a random sharing, or when conversations focus on a person’s ” game plan” for his/her life. In fact most of the time I fall into this trap myself. I will serve the Lord when He has fixed my family’s finances. To give a talk when He has prepared for me the right conditions: no rain or snow, someone picks me up and takes me home, food is available, ample time for me to prepare preferably two weeks in advance, etc. When He gives me a good salary so I can save up for my future family.

While all of this is well and good, it is easy to fall into a trap of taking comfort in the gifts and blessings. That when these comforts are taken away, and for sure they will be, that our service suddenly stops because our parameters for service are taken away.

The gifts that the Giver gives are blessings and comforts that He bestows on us for us to better know and experience Him. The Giver is in fact infinite, and therefore His gifts can come in an infinite number of forms. His blessings can come in the form of a sunrise, in fact any person can sense God nature of how wondrous it is. But it takes a different kind of sensitivity to see the gifts in our day-to-day struggle. When deadlines are choking us. When our bosses are breathing down our necks in order to deliver our company’s needs. When our family members are sick. When relationships are tested. When moths come out of our wallets.

It is when our parameters of service change that our focus on the Giver allows us to be sensitive enough to see that the gifts He is giving us has changed. It is when we recognize these gifts that we come to know and experience Him better. Our focus then lies in the Giver of gifts, and not on the gifts themselves.

Our yes to Him is our yes to Him not because we say yes to what He gives us, but because it is Him we say yes to. Our service then becomes definite, purposeful, and unstoppable because the focus is on the Lord and on nothing else.

I will serve the Lord because He has given me “X”.

X = Himself

2 Corinthians 1:3-7

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken; for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.

Veni Sancte Spiritus.

Come Holy Spirit.

Consume us. Refine us. Purify us.

Fix our eyes on You.

Veni Sancte Spiritus.

Here In Your Presence

To pray for someone is the least you can do for someone and it is also the most you can do for them.

Recently, I have found so much peace in prayer. Without prayer, I would not be able to love as I do (still working on it), be as generous as I can sometimes be (also a work in progress), and as compassionate as I try to be. It’s an amazing gift we have, to have a constant line of communication with our Almighty Father, at all times. We are called to be saints and one of the best ways to purify our hearts is through prayer.

I make it a point to supplicate the lives of each of my family members and each individual brother or sister in my household. I know I don’t know how to love, especially to the extent that our Merciful Father loves us. It would be foolish to not go to Love Himself in order to learn how to love. I am usually quick to see faults in others, but when I lift up each brother or sister to the Lord, He not only sheds light to purify the hurts, faults, and wrongdoings, but His light magnifies the greatness of Himself within each and every person in my life.

How amazing is our God to turn our affliction into love and joy!

When I reflect on my own life, the Lord never fails to reveal to me how small I am compared to Him. How great it is to be so humbled at the foot of His cross! My life is of such insignificance but You Lord have breathed a purpose in me. I would be lying if I claimed that my best characteristics were my own. It is because of my Saviour that I am compassionate. It is because of Him that I can be generous. It is His overflowing and endless love that allows me the privilege and honour to love others.

I will always remember when one of my past counterparts corrected me and said, “Never joke about prayer, it is sacred.” Our prayer time must be safeguarded; Whenever we approach the throne of His Grace, it will always be a profound and life changing experience. It is through prayer that my love for my family and my household transcends to heights I could not have reached on my own. It is through prayer that I am able to experience the Holy Spirit flowing through others. It is through prayer that I am constantly being broken down and built back up.

Honestly, I cannot even bring justice to my experiences in prayer. Thank You Lord for allowing me to be vulnerable, broken, and empty in Your presence.

How can I not be moved, Lord here with You, so have Your way in me. Lord there is just one thing that I will seek. This is my cry, my one desire. Just to be where You are Lord, now and forever. It’s more than a song, my one desire is to be with You, Jesus.

The Three Apostles

Yesterday I found myself in the Oratory of Saint Joseph in Montreal. A year after I said yes to becoming a Mission Volunteer, a month after I became a Full Time Pastoral Worker – finally ticking off all the major areas where CFC-Youth is present in Canada. And while the whole basilica is beautiful inside and out with amazing architecture, art, and history on it’s side plus the Holy Eucharist being inside it; you can never really go wrong. And while the hundreds of pilgrims were doing there thing, I found myself glued to three fixtures that were grouped together. It was the three statues of Saints Jude Thaddeus, Mathias, and Peter.

For the longest time, I’ve had an affinity to these three apostles. In fact, it’s safe to say that they have been my friends since day one.

Saint Jude

Saint Jude Thaddeus, the forgotten apostle, because his name was close to that of the traitor is in fact the patron of hopeless causes. Out of the three he was the latest I befriended, but had an immediate click with. He found me at the time when I was preparing for my licensure examination for Chemical Engineering in Manila. I had to cram 5 years worth of knowledge, formulas, concepts in Math, Chemistry, and Chemical Engineering in 6 months for a three day exam – I deemed it impossible. Doubt, laziness and a host of other things crept up that led me to breaking down quite a few times before and during the exam. But praise God, Saint Jude prayed for me and I passed. In the bigger picture, I do consider myself a hopeless and lost cause. Yet here I am, a missionary for one of the biggest lay organizations of the Catholic Church.

Saint Mathias

Saint Mathias was the outsider who found himself cast into the inner group. When Judas was gone, they needed somebody to fill in his place – and in a stroke of luck (literally, his name was casted from a lot of a hundred or so), he became part of the twelve. Being the non-canadian for the first batch of Mission Volunteers in Canada, and the only non-canadian trainee for full time pastoral work from Canada – one can say that I am in fact an outsider. Me being a Mission Volunteer was not in my plans when I moved here, but through God’s grace and calling – I’ve taken a step further in Full Time Pastoral Work.

Saint Peter

Saint Peter, the rock, was not whom Jesus loved the most. In fact the gospels say that it was St. John whom Jesus loved the most. Saint Peter was the one who loved Jesus the most. He was the first one who would always jump out into the water to meet the Lord even if it meant walking on water and almost drowning. He was the one who wanted to serve the Lord first in all things, but he was also the first one to deny him – he did so three times in one instance. But the Lord did not give up on him, he in fact was called to something greater – to be the rock of the Church – our first pope. More often than not, I have denied the One whom I love the most – yet still He calls me. He still loves me and gives me more chances than I deserve.

The Three Apostles

I could go on and on about how I can relate to these apostles, but the amazing thing is that they were grouped together somewhere in a church thousands of miles from where I was born. And to see them together, praying for me all this time brings me to tears and above all – amazed that God loves me so much to take three of His best to pray for me and lead me to where I am.

They all went to the ends of the world to proclaim the Risen King, and here I am in Montreal – the last of the big mission areas of Canada that I haven’t been to an affirmation of the mission in the Three Apostles.

Saints Jude Thaddeus, Mathias, and Peter, Pray for us. Amen.