Tag: Mercy

An Invitation

The world is literally crumbling right now. It’s amazing how just one virus can bring the world to its knees. A lot of people are suffering and dying because of it. It brings us to the question, how could God allow something like this to happen? What is the good in all that is happening around the world right now? Where is God?

It’s funny because before everything happened I wasn’t really taking Lent seriously, it was more so as a routine for me. Actually I didn’t even realize it was Lent or take it in until I was at the Ash Wednesday mass. I went about this Lent just thinking that it is just another year where I have to get through these 40 days that nothing was going to come out of this. Man, was I ever wrong. Once COVID-19 started to get worse as the days went on, I began to realize what I was missing. It was hard not being able to go to mass, realizing that I was not able to be with Christ physically. With everything going on it is making me realize of how much I am missing and how much of my life is not centred around Christ. Here I am, at the beginning of Lent thinking it’ll be okay because I will continue to serve and that will be pleasing to the Lord. I’m not saying that serving Him is not pleasing, but when not putting Him at the centre of my life, I realized that my service becomes routine as well and just “another thing to do”. Now that I am not able to be with Him physically, I felt like it was all over. I realized that I relied so much on Christ being there physically present so much that I forgot that He is literally everywhere and in everyone we encounter.

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” – Blaise Pascal

With everything that is going on and with a lot of reflection, I am realizing the aspects of my life that Christ is asking me to put Him at the centre. That with all that this world throws at us, God gives us the opportunities to be closer with Him. Suffering is an invitation to be closer with God. We are given a sliver of Christ’s cross to carry. Nothing that we are feeling – the pain, anger, tiredness, sadness, it is nothing compared to what Christ went through, bearing the whole world’s sins on His cross that He carried. The mere fact that Christ walked this earth shows just how much God wants to be present with us and a part of our lives. So I pray, continue to let Him into your hearts. Pray for me as well that I do the same. Make Jesus the centre of your life – in all aspects.

Lord, thank You for blessing us with this life, with the opportunities to encounter You. Lord, protect us from all that is happening right now in this world. So many are suffering but in the same way we know that You are hurt as well seeing us in pain. Protect those on the frontlines Lord – the nurses, doctors, janitors and all those who are putting themselves at risk with everything. Through this suffering Lord, allow us to seize those opportunities where we are able to bring you to the centre of our lives, but to also be a beacon of hope for those around us that aren’t seeing or experiencing Your love.

Amen.

Christian Medeiros

Crown of Creation

This past weekend I attended ‘Princess Diaries‘ that Toronto SFC hosted for all the sisters. I was excited to just be a participant and not have to worry about serving. But then a week before the event, Renee, the GTA West Head asked me if I could lead the Praisefest for Saturday night. And you know what happened that whole week before the event? PANIC.

I was so mentally drained from trying to figure out the dynamics of a worship, the order of the songs, the prayers that go before the songs, the appropriate songs, the transitions, and everything else in between. On Friday morning I reached some point of mental desperation and just exasperatedly told God that he really should have chosen someone else.

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To understand this more let’s look at the three  desires planted in every woman’s heart:

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a) the desire to be romanced
b) the desire to play an irreplaceable role in an adventure
c) the desire to unveil beauty

Those desires are often misunderstood which is why a lot of sisters end up broken. We turn to the wrong sources to fill the void. I myself sought those desires out in multiple people, men boys who had no other agenda other than to fulfill their own desires.

Fifteen minutes before the session ended (New Heartbeats) He granted me the grace and wisdom to finally see all the pieces come together. And when it finally sank in, I could not contain the peace, joy and love that was pouring out of my own heart!

He said,

“My dearest Therese. These desires are not something to be afraid of. Do not deny yourself these desires because each one will lead you closer to me. Do you not already know that every movement in your heart is known to me? I fashioned that very thing that beats inside of you. Unite it with my sacred heart and will understand better the plans I have for you, as woman.”

 

THE DESIRE TO BE ROMANCED, I placed in you so that you will come to me in Adoration. I will embrace every part of you in the silence. Come to me, and I will pour myself out to you. Do not be afraid to glance out at me for I long to look out at your face. Each time you come, the heavens rejoice. This is where you belong, this is where you are meant to be- here with me. My beloved I have waited for you and you are finally here! Have FAITH that I am here.

THE DESIRE TO PLAY AN IRREPLACEABLE ROLE, I placed in you so that you will come to the House of Worship and receive me in the Holy Eucharist. Come to me exactly as you are. You say to me, Lord but I am broken, battered, shattered.  And His reply: “But I NEED YOU. YES, YOU.” From the moment you receive me on your tongue you become the ultimate living tabernacle and you are NO longer broken, battered, shattered. I pour out my Holy Spirit within you, and my love which is far more precious than gold will bind you back together. There will always be HOPE.

THE DESIRE TO UNVEIL BEAUTY, I placed in you so that you will come to me in Confession. No sin you’ve committed, no sin that you are committing, no sin that you will commit can ever be too much for my cross. Nothing is more beautiful than a woman who humbles herself and acknowledges her weaknesses and limitations. All those layers you choose to hide behind, the masks you choose to wear around you will all be washed away. In every single instance, you come out as clean and pure just as I intended for you to be. I meet you with nothing but LOVE.

Wow. Praise the Lord. I could not contain myself in that tiny little seat. The Lord fulfilled ALL THOSE DESIRES in me within the past 24hrs! He granted me my trinity run; Adoration at Our Lady of Lourdes the night before, Confession before the last session, and Eucharist shortly after. The Lord loved me so much that He made straight my paths right before I stood before my sisters with a heart that was now READY AND WILLING.

“You, eternal trinity, are a deep sea. The more I enter you, the more I discover, and the more I discover, the more I seek you.”- St. Catherine of Siena

Amen.

Mercy and Peace

The Lord revealed a simple Truth to me yesterday during Mass with Char while we were all praying and singing “Lamb of God.” When we all sang the last line “grant us peace,” that’s when He made it clear. He said “My merciful love grants peace.” So many things made sense the more I meditated on this.

It’s amazing how many times we beckon the Lord to have mercy on us during Mass. It is the only proper posture to have when knowing that soon we will be receiving the Body and Blood of Christ, the King of kings, and Lord of all. We all stand before Him great sinners and truly unworthy of approaching the Holy of Holies. We must totally rely on His mercy toward us if we would like to have peace in our hearts when receiving Him.

Moments before receiving the Holy Eucharist, and after praying the Lamb of God, we humbly say while kneeling, “Lord, I’m not worthy that You should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.” In this prayer we imitate the centurion who was the one who said this. His posture was that of complete humility, contrition, and faith. He knew the Lord would hear his prayer and be merciful to him, and because of that he had peace. A priest once told me that the word Jesus says that heals our soul is peace—the peace that only He can give. And this peace comes from His merciful love.

Whenever I feel like things are not going so well in my life, like being caught in a storm, feeling lost, confused, and being more prone to sin, it is because I stop relying and believing in His mercy. When I take my eyes off His merciful gaze, that is when I lose the peace in my soul. What usually helps is when I do a thorough examination of conscious while asking God to help me see my sins. It hurts but it is necessary. I praise God when I feel very sorrowful for the ways I offended Him. I then ask for the grace to have true contrition for my sins, and to help me repent. With this posture I go to Confession to receive total absolution and forgiveness of all my sins. That is when He restores that peace in my heart, and what helps me to be merciful to others. It’s a lot easier to be merciful to others when I realize how merciful God has been to me.

Lamb of God Who takes away the sins of the world, grant us peace. Amen.

Our Lady of Perpetual Help, pray for us!

On Track

Whenever I feel like I’m deviating from the person God wants me to be, I reflect on the beatitudes and virtues to help guide me to be on the right track again.

The beatitudes beautifully describe the character of Jesus. Striving to embody the beatitudes is a practical way of becoming more like Jesus Christ. You can find the list of beatitudes in Matthew 5:3-12.

Meditating on the virtues is important for me as well. They are the benchmarks of living a holy life. It’s good to reflect on the theological (faith, hope, charity) and cardinal (temperance, prudence, justice, fortitude) virtues. I always ask myself “where am I in terms of the virtues? Have I made progress? Where do I lack? How is God helping me to grow in them?” I have found that thinking about the virtues often helps me to advance in them daily.

My hope at the end of ever year is to able to think back at the start of the year and be able to say I’m not the same person. Not because of where I live, or the new responsibilities I have, but because I have grown in the beatitudes and virtues. I have grown to be more like Christ.

I must add, that reflecting on the beatitudes and virtues is a good way to get back on track. However, the best and surest way, and the first place to start is always Confession. For me, availing of this Sacrament is essential because I am a sinner, and I sin every day. Confession reconciles us back to God. We must always start with our relationship with Him and rely fully on His graces. Without His grace we can do nothing. It’s His grace that helps us grow in the virtues and forms us in the beatitudes—and essentially—into the person of His Son, Jesus Christ, in Mary our Mother.

Grace! Mercy! Love! Mercy keeps the door open to the fullness of God’s love and graces to be superabundantly poured into our hearts. Let us be merciful so that God will show the same mercy.

Start with God. Make sure there is nothing in the way of your relationship with Him. Let His merciful Love embrace and make everything new. Love Him first and the rest will follow 🙂 We don’t need to wait for the new year or even for an extravagant event to happen in our lives. He is waiting for us in Confession to forgive us of those sins that have been hindering our relationship with Him. He is thirsting for us in the Eucharist to give us Himself,  and to sanctify our lives!

To be on track is not about “doing me” but about “being me,” and I can only be myself if I look to the One who knew me even before I was born and Who knit me in my mother’s womb. Who knows when I sit and when I stand and Who has prepared a place for me in Heaven.

Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner. Jesus, I trust in you. Amen.

P.S. A good indicator that we are growing in the beatitudes and virtues is if our lives are bearing the fruits of the Holy Spirit which are “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” (Galatians 5:22-23)

Remember

“Jesus, remember me when you come into Your kingdom.” —Luke 23:42

I truly saw myself as the thief beside the crucified Jesus. Praise God for His merciful love shown in this moment. The Lord assured the sinner that he would be with Him in paradise. It almost brings me to tears thinking of how much our Lord is willing to forgive us if we truly are sorrowful and repent in our hearts. God is truly merciful!

Jesus, as you remember me, help me to remember You. In my daily life, let not sin or distractions take me away from being mindful of Your presence and merciful love. When I do sin, please give me the grace seek your forgiveness and repent without delay. May my heart be always open to the outpouring of Your love and grace. Amen.

Love Him

If my goal is to love Jesus perfectly then I need to look to Mother Mary who loved Him more than anyone that has walked this earth. No wonder why I need her help? She loved Jesus the most perfectly and she helps us all love Him the same. It’s also amazing to know that she loves me just as much as she loves her Son. Such tender mercy she has for all of us.

Thank You, God, for giving me a Mother who, with the Holy Spirit, nurtures my growth in Christ. Amen.

Blessed_Virgin_Mary

Trinity Run

Winter is fast approaching, and I can already feel my body starting to switch over to hibernation mode. Soon enough it’ll be too hard to get up out of bed, nearly impossible to escape out of those double duvets. Tis the season for excusing our way out of health habits.

I used to run regularly to maintain some sort of physical activity but that died down since who knows when. Spring is always difficult to face after long winters because of the three month break. I personally loathe treadmills and will refuse to get on one. I’d rather wait. I much rather prefer the great outdoors, but Toronto winter weather does very little to help with that. Daylight savings mean shorter days and longer nights. It takes approximately two weeks to adjust. My body is definitely losing on this front.

Our spiritual health suffers from the same changes. We have cycles where we’re going  strong- we’ve found some sort of groove with our prayer time and involvement with the sacraments. At these moments, our relationship with Christ is toned and trimmed. Excess weight cut off. The closer we get to Christ the less baggage we carry- our material and worldly desires no longer necessary. We are tied down to less.

But then, at some point, we face an itch of sorts. An itch that just needs to be scratched. A craving that just needs to be satisfied. A thirst that needs to be quenched. But instead of reaching for the healthy & obvious choice of water we go for the Coke. Pepsi. Ginger Ale. Root Beer.  And just like that, our impenetrable fortress comes crashing down. Why? Because we foolishly ignored that cracked wooden frame that started to break- little by little. It was easier to feign ignorance to something that needed fixing. It’s easier to give in and let our human needs win.

“I’m only doing it once.” I still exercise anyway. Cheating won’t hurt.” 

That’s what I realize happened to me. And for some reason or another, I kept making excuses and reasoned my way out of a very fruitful, beautiful prayer habit. It only took one small “set back”. I cut down my prayer time, my weekday church dates, and adoration drop ins so that I could bulk up on old habits which I knew were only going to get me in worse (spiritual) shape.

Negative thoughts filled my head. I became impatient, moody, and lethargic. Two weeks passed since my last confession, and although I knew I needed it PRONTO …my body would magically (temporarily) shake off the anxiety. It made me think I could keep going. Nyeh, it can wait.

Nope.

Confession is our detox. Our body needs to get rid of built up toxins the same way our soul needs to get rid of impurities. Getting through it is tough, but we always come out healthier afterwards. Praise God, for God because I finally went for that detox round. He knew I needed it. And I knew I needed it. The hardest step is always the first, the hardest run is always the most dreadful.

Our prayer life can be a long outstretched summer. However if we trip and fall into the darkness of winter, we shouldn’t despair. We don’t have to endure three months of waiting. We can choose to fast forward to spring.  My winter lasted 8 days too long, but today’s TRINITY RUN (adoration, confession and Holy Eucharist) allowed me to see the Son rise gloriously. Thankfully, our salvation and redemption is not bound by time, because we are loved by a God whose love is endless and timeless. 

 “A clean heart is a free heart. A free heart can love Christ with an undivided love in chastity, convinced that nothing and nobody will separate it from His love.”
-Blessed Teresa of Calcutta