True North Missionaries Journal

Three weeks ago, I did the Way of the Cross after X number of years of not doing it. As I was going through each station in meditation and prayer, I was reminded that although the  Lord gives us our own crosses to bear, He loves us too much just to leave us alone. While this is a given already, there are times when I question if He’s really there because I’m so engrossed in the things that weigh me down. When I’m in the thick of my problems, I fail to recognize Him and I  think that’s why He sends people I can talk to and interact with in His place to help me out.

He sends me my personal Simons of Cyrene to help me carry my burdens – whether it’s through the physical act of carrying something when transporting things to events, sharing in the work load to make it easier on me, or by listening to me and alleviating my concerns. These are also the people who make me smile and laugh and in that moment, make me forget what I’m going through. They are the people I can have fun with; those who distract me in a good way so that for a few minutes, I need not think of the things that make me worry.

He sends Veronicas to me too. While they do not my wipe my face literally, they do provide comfort and clarity amidst the confusion and doubt I face. These are the people I can talk to – those who give me advice and a new way of looking at what I’m  going through to give me hope instead of feeling despair. They are the ones who help me focus; those who centre me back on Christ again.

He also sends me people who show me that vulnerability is not frowned upon but rather, encouraged. Also known as the Weeping Women. They show me it’s okay to cry and that I don’t have to be tough all the time. Through these people, I’m reminded that there will be times in service / mission where it may be too much to handle. And when this happens, we need not keep it all to ourselves – we are free to tell another person so that they may comfort us. These are the people who may be going through even tougher times than I am and they show me that what I have on my plate is not so bad after all.

Similar to how Jesus encountered these people as He was carrying His cross, I don’t get them all at the same time. Truly the Lord knows who to send at the right time to comfort and help me. For them, I am grateful. My prayer is to make me (and everyone else) more attuned to these people so that I don’t have to go through everything by myself. The Lord is so great. Even when we think we’re alone and we forget that He’s always with us, He doesn’t leave us to our own sorrows. Rather, He sends tangible people – people we can touch and call and text to reaffirm us of the Lord’s love for us. 🙂

It’s always sad when you see someone leave your life especially when it’s a close friend or loved one.

Agree?

Well, the Lord revealed to me otherwise. I’ve been blessed with a household that I can surely call home in a group of friends I’ve been able to travel with, share victories with, explore vocation, laugh with, joke with, cry with, but most importantly, share my love of the Lord with.

Meet the Klondike kids.

This is our last photo as a household for now. This is Tanya. Someone I consider a close friend of mine that I hold dearly in my heart as a true sister of Christ. She is moving away to further allow the Lord to work in her life, completely. We shared stories on how different we all are, but yet how much the Lord has allowed her to pierce our hearts with an arrow sent to by the Lord as an affirmation of His love. I’m not gonna lie… A lot of tears were shed…but definitely not out of sadness or sorrow, but of overwhelming joy that though we will be separated, we are always United in Christ. That one of our closest friends is surrendering her all to everything the Lord is asking of her…

So I reflected…what an affirmation of what it is like to physically witness true complete trust in the Lord. To see someone do that…it’s truly as if you are staring at a reflection of Christ…

I sit here thinking.. I’ve never lost a friend like this before…

but praise God that it is in this way, we are affirmed the Lord is working, and we are obediently responding. It reminds me of the story of Abraham being asked out of obedience to offer to the Lord his loved one as an offering. I feel as if us (the brothers in our HH) is being asked of the same thing as Abraham. What came out of obedience, came blessings. The prayers for lifting up our dear sister to the Lord will be not different. I am affirmed that in Him bringing us together in a life long friendship to physically separate us in such a short time, was for the purpose of being together again…This time in true prayer, and eventually home bound to heaven. How beautifully you work in our lives Lord.

Trust me, it’s hard…I’ll say it again…I’ve never lost a friend like this before… But I’m glad that what will never be lost is our unity with Christ, with prayer, and offerings.

Thanks for the time we were able to spend together. How beautiful is Your plan. Lord, thank you for your never ending love. Bless our sister Tanya as she moves with Your spirit in which ever way you ask of her. Allow our bond as a household be strengthened by the promise that we are always united by You. You, are enough of us. Amen.

Deo Gloria

Dang…someone cutting onions in here? Not gonna lie, I had quite the time writing this on my phone while in bed, reflecting.

“Mercy isn’t mercy if it’s earned.”

I can think of three distinct situations in my life where I sincerely believed that I was betrayed and didn’t deserve the sort of treatment I received. Even though I’m at peace with those situations now, when I revisit those memories, I remember being stunned by the news, severely hurt that someone I loved and who loved me could do that much wrong against me, and very confused as to why they did it. While I thought for years that nobody I knew could really relate to me, I recently rediscovered that Jesus Christ had always known, but more so; He fully understood.

I was reading the Bible on the bus and LRT last week while I was on my way to a meeting at my couple coordinators’ home. I was reading the Gospel of St. Matthew and I was also incredibly stunned, hurt, and confused as to why or how these events occurred in this order:

1) Judas betrays Jesus Christ with the sign of a kiss, and hands him off to the chief priests. (Matthew 26:47-50)
2) Every single disciple deserts Jesus Christ and runs away. (Matthew 26:56)
3) Peter denies Jesus Christ three times. (Matthew 26:69-75)

All of this occurs in one single chapter, Matthew 26, after the Lord so graciously gives Himself in body and blood through humble bread and wine (Matthew 26:26-29). I am amazed because although Jesus Christ foretold that all of these instances were going to happen and that He must have been absolutely hurt by those He was closest to and loved, He never ceased to love them fully.

1) At the moment that Jesus Christ saw Judas at the time of His betrayal, He refers to him as “my friend“. (Matthew 26:50)
2) Although every single disciple deserts Jesus Christ, for the only one who sees Him crucified, He gives him (and us) His mother, Mother Mary (John 19:26-27). After His resurrection, Jesus appears to all of his disciples many times, giving them the ability to believe in Him, and then later gives them the Holy Spirit (Acts 2:1-4).
3) Jesus Christ then forgives Peter before He asks him if he loves Him three times. (John 21:15-19)

In these various situations, I recognize more that Jesus Christ is True God and True Man. On a personal level, I see Jesus as True Man simply because He seems to have experienced everything I have, but in greater extremes. He not only knows, but fully understands what it feels like to be betrayed and mistreated for no reason at all. Jesus as True God is illuminated in the way He loves unreservedly. As the Father so loves perfectly, the Son does as well. His love abundantly flows out of Him in founts of kindness and mercy. Furthermore Jesus doesn’t just show His love by forgiving, He continues to give more and more of Himself until He has given Himself fully, to the point of death — even death on a cross. And then — there’s more — He gives us the Holy Spirit.

How loved are we? How loved am I?

As I journey onward during this Lenten season, I pray that I remember that in all instances Jesus Christ remains True God and True Man. With this, I pray that I may be inspired and moved to forgive and give of myself totally, without question, even if others don’t deserve it or “earn” it. If my God can forgive the inexcusable in me, I can certainly make the sincere effort to forgive the inexcusable in others.

Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us.
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us.
Amen.

“What we’re starved for in the “starvation diet gospel” is the beauty of truth. When Christian teaching is presented without beauty, heart is turned off, even if what’s being presented is true. Worse still, when Christian teaching is set to an “ugly tune,” for example, when the presentation of truth is tinged with self-righteousness, condemnation, accusation, or judgementalism- the truth come across as an front to our hearts. Our hearts[then] revolt-with good reason: we’re made for beauty. We must have it. We yearn for it. And when the version if Christianity that is presented to us doesn’t supply what we’re looking for, we seek it elsewhere.” — Christopher West

 

This weekend was definitely one to be thankful for. I went on my first mission trip as a Mission Volunteer not really knowing what to expect. I never really went on mission outside of Edmonton while I was serving in CFC Youth, aside from probably two or three occasions. The thought of serving and doing talks for the first time in months made me anxious, let alone the fact that we would be conducting 3 events (1 GA & 2 trainings) in the span of 2 days.  *cue worries* (which I’m still working on heh)

It wasn’t until I was actually in the midst of the weekend that I remembered that this is not my work but the Lord’s. I am merely an instrument – a tool the Lord uses to cultivate the harvest. What a blessing it is to be used and to witness God’s love at work. Seeing their eager faces, ready to learn and grow, brought me so much inspiration, joy, and excitement. These are the youth who are going to spread God’s Love to their friends. These are the evangelizers who will carry on the mission. These are the ones who will help satiate Jesus’ thirst for love and for souls. Although they are young and although their area has faced difficulties, they are still willing to allow themselves to have the heart of a servant – the heart of Jesus.

Father, thank you for using me and allowing me to witness Your love through those I serve.

“Do not let anyone look down on you because you are young, but be an example of love, faith and purity…” – 1 Timothy 4:12

pc: Ate Evony

Fearless Hearts: Seek What Moves You Towards Freedom
by Sister Mary Gabriel (SEEK 2015)

      A lot of the hidden struggles women face stem from forgetting who we are: our unshakable identity as daughters of God. The truth of who we are sets us free from ungodly fear and shame and reveals our purpose and destiny, unleashing transforming love into our hearts and the world.

15:53|
“Our God has a human heart and He reveals His heart.…This is the image of the Divine Mercy. Between the years 1931 and 1938, Jesus appeared to a nun in Poland who we now call Saint Faustina. He appeared to Saint Faustina and He revealed what was in His heart
– an inexhaustible living fount of Mercy.

And he said His heart is always perpetually open to us
– He excludes no one.

 In this image, Jesus is not just pointing to His heart…He is actually showing us what is in His heart…He is pulling back…He is showing us His heart. He is revealing what is in His heart and He is saying,
“Come to me. Come to me.”

 Jesus knows it’s only by letting what’s in His heart be seen, that He can be known and loved by us. He is always teaching us something.”

                                                                                  – Sister Mary Gabriel

 

You expired, Jesus, 
but the source of life gushed forth for souls
and the ocean of mercy opened up for the whole world. 
O Fountain of Life, unfathomable Divine Mercy,
envelop the whole world and empty Yourself out upon us.

O Blood and Water,
which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus
as a fountain of mercy for us,
I trust in You.

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One,
Have mercy on us and on the whole world. 
Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One,
Have mercy on us and on the whole world. 
Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One,
Have mercy on us and on the whole world. 

JESUS, King of mercy, I trust in You!

Amen

The word “mission” has been evolving for me over the past several years. At an early stage, it simply meant going to an under-developed country and doing pastoral work or physical labour like building houses. I thought mission was only for people who are missionaries, not necessarily for people who have “regular” jobs. After a while, I understood it as going to any place, regardless of economic, political, social, or cultural state, and doing something that helped people become closer to God. I believe that mission is all these things and more. It is more than physically going somewhere but it requires presence – mind, body, heart, and soul.

There are many times where I have over complicated mission and as a result have failed to do anything because of fear. I failed to move, to make a decision, to say yes, because I wanted some sort of security. There have been times where I have put mission in a box and as a result did things that I wanted to do or that I thought was best, only to realize that there was something else I should’ve done or that was needed.

I think mission is a call to go out of oneself. It means to do something for God and others, not for oneself. This can be done any where at any time, regardless of profession or educational background someone has. The moment someone realizes that the life they’re living is not for them is the moment, I think, someone begins their mission. Mission is call that everyone has. It is something that everyone can do.