True North Missionaries Journal

(Sept 29, 2016)

St. Joseph’s Oratory – Tabernacle Reflection

Week of Sept 25^th-Oct 1^st

Lord, you spoil me time and time again with your graces.  Not with material things, but with spiritual nourishment.  How I’ve been craving time with you, and you alone.  Please continue to guide me in this journey.

Your graces are sufficient and often in abundance.  What will you have me do?   I always feel guilty asking for more.  “It’s the Lord’s nature to bless”.  I keep thinking back to that comment I saw this morning.

How often do I doubt your anointing? Why is it hard for me to be faithful to it? Lord thank you for continually reminding me that you will take care and provide. “He equips those that answers His calling.”

Is self-doubt really 90%? How could we have so many negative thoughts when we have You? Lord help me to only focus and rely on you and what is truth.

My career, my vocation, my being.  They are all in your hands.  Guide me, nourish me. Lord, keep me under your embrace.  Let me rest and find peace and truth in your word.  That I may be able to prove what is good, kind and true to others.   I have been broken before and fallen many times, but continue to use me in my weakness to show Your strength.

-Amen

It’s been a month and a half since I’ve served as an MV for YCOM. I’m finding the service is a lot different from being an Area Head in terms of the role itself, and the responsibilities that come with it. While I do miss the pastoral aspect of leading a household, I have this great sense of peace and joy that serving in YCOM is really a part of God’s plan for me.

When I first began serving in YCOM, I had a few brothers and sisters come up to me and say, “Hey, look you’re YCOM now! Didn’t you always want to serve in it? Your dream has come true!”

Praise God that this dream has come true haha! But in all honesty I totally forgot that I even had the desire to serve in YCOM because over the past 3 or 4 years I’ve developed an interest in social justice and evangelization through building relationships. But I’m considering myself extremely blessed as I learn more about YCOM and delve into its responsibilities.

At first glance, I find that I enjoy designing graphics, learning from creative people, and being mentored by my brothers and sisters who have had so much experience in this service. While I know I’m not professionally trained nor well-practiced by any means, I’m excited that I have the opportunity to grow in this service in whatever ways the Lord has planned.

At this year’s KFC Family Conference, my counterpart and I had the opportunity to serve in the DocuTeam. For myself, I can’t even begin to tell you how foreign it felt to be one of the first faces one would see in a video and how stressful it can get to post event updates on social media LOL.

For those who follow me on Instagram, perhaps you are aware that I’m still posting photos from my graduation that happened in June. It’s almost October and I’m still sifting through photos figuring out what to post next. So one can imagine how different the dynamic is from getting used to posting photos late versus posting photos as soon as possible.

Through this experience, I’m learning that YCOM is a service that demands a sense of urgency, not just in the context of a single event, but in the grandness of life itself. We live in a world which suffers greatly because many live without faith in Christ, but each time a graphic, photo, or a video is posted which aspires to share the joy of living a life for Christ and in Christ, it can make a difference, be it small or completely transformative.

The other day I was watching videos on CFC-Youth Canada’s YouTube Channel and, wow, God is amazing! Video after video, I was reminded that CFC-Youth is a gift that needs to be shared with others, not just through acts of service and through building personal relationships, but through the media, especially the digital media because this is where all the young people are today.

Today I feel blessed to participate in the mission in this particular way. I can see again that YCOM is an extremely important service tool in CFC-Youth because it can possibly spark someone’s interest in joining the community or even begin seeking a relationship with Christ. Or perhaps it can reignite someone’s desire to return to Christ, serve Him in a greater or different capacity, or to possibly remind them to simply have hope in Him. Possibly it can be the impetus to thrust someone to surrender their life to Jesus. We can never underestimate the power of the Holy Spirit.

Dear heart of Jesus,

Thank You Lord for inviting me to serve You in YCOM, and giving me the grace to see Your love is not limited to old means of evangelization, but new ways of evangelization as well. Please bless all those who serve in YCOM and to increase our faith in You.

I am excited for what’s to come in this service and for all that You want me to learn and experience, but I am in need of Your grace to be humble. I see YCOM as a service that will continue to stretch me in ways that I’m not used to because it is all still so new to me. Please give me the grace to pray and hope that I may be patient with You, with others, and with myself — just as You’ve been ever so patient with me.

I hope that in my eagerness to serve You in this service, that I can still remain calm, productive, and allow nothing to disturb my peace. Please give me the grace to love and serve with kindness and gentleness. Amen.

Our Lady of Guadalupe, Star of the New Evangelization, pray for us.
St. Peter and St. Paul, pray for us.
St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us.

There are instances when my past mistakes come to mind. Sometimes I intentionally think of them, because by doing so, I noticed I become more patient, understanding and wanting to help others rather than judge their actions. Sometimes they come as an encouragement for myself, “Ting, you did a good job turning away from those things”.

 

I have learned to teach myself and encourage others to do what is right by Heaven’s standard and not what is easy by the standard of the world.

 

When I am asked how to forget a wrongdoing that caused too much pain and is impossible to forget even after hearing confession, I always say, I do not know because I do remember too! and besides going to confession is our way of acknowledging before God we made a mistake, not necessarily to forget things. But I praise the Lord for allowing me to remember, because of those memories I also am reminded of God’s grace to humanity. Because He is love, He will keep loving us. The memory is there but LOVE takes the pain away, then the memory becomes both a lesson and a reminder of our destiny, Heaven, a place where we are all invited to see by conforming our ways to The way, The truth and The life.

Last Saturday, Kids for Christ participated in their 7th Global Day of Service. We collected used clothes and home items and gathered them in several bags. We walked from our venue (Our Lady of Fatima Parish) to our local non-profit organization, called Renaissance. There, our used goods are re-used, re-invested in the community and they also provide work to help sustain individuals and their families.

My biggest blessing is seeing the youth so involved in making sure that the kids understand why we are doing this and what will happen to the items they donated. It’s always amazing for me to see young people being and bringing Christ to little kids. If there’s anything you need to know about me, it’s that I love kids! I have a huge passion for helping young children discover the world and to be able to bring them closer to Jesus is a dream come true.

Our world is filled with beautiful things and people but nowadays, we see the ugly and the evil happening around us. I believe that children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they possess inside (shout out to Ms. Houston). A little cliche, I know, but I really believe that our younger brothers and sisters have the power to change the world we will live in tomorrow.

However, I wished that more brothers and sisters throughout all the ministries can realize that they can also be part of this beautiful opportunity to shed Christ’s light to others. But this inspired me to be hopeful for the future. The joy the kids spread whenever I encounter them can only lead me to share it to others. Global day of service does not have to be a once a year event. It should be be everyday. We should acknowledge the greatness of Our God and be willing to share it to others every day of our lives.

Lord God, I thank you for the abundance of resources made available to me. I lift up to you all the kids and their families, that that may be empowered by the Holy Spirit to be world changers. That you continue to transform their hearts into the servants you want them to be. I pray that you can grace me with more humility in giving my time, talents and treasures to my brothers and sisters who need it. Help me to love you more by loving the people you love. I pray for those who might not know you yet, that you may use me to spread your Light to them. Amen.

AMDG

“Do not fear beloved. Peace! Take courage and be strong.” When he spoke to me, I grew strong and said “Speak to me my Lord, for You have strengthened me” (Daniel 10:19)

Humble my heart, O Lord!
To accept things as they are, to not doubt nor question Your will
Soften my heart, O Lord
That I may let go of all anger deep in me
all the pride that consumes me
all the anxiety that makes me restless
Humble me, O God
that I may accept the justice I deserve
that I may accept all the things You have planned for me
Attune my heart with Yours O Lord
to be free and be the master of my own emotions
to love my neighbours the way You have loved me
to forgive others, O God the way you easily forgive all my sins
to have a heart as big as Yours, that never fails to give love to others, most especially those who needed them
Strengthen me Lord, that I may be able to follow Your will
Bless me with a servant’s heart, O Lord

with this I humbly pray, in Your name. Amen.

(July 14, 2016)

“Where is my purse?” This is the question a patient of mine keeps on asking every 3 minutes or so. She is around 80 years old, who recently fractured a bone and needed a surgery to fix it. She will tell you she doesn’t know where she is, but she can track time by looking on her wristwatch. She knows she has shoes somewhere but she doesn’t know if the bed facing her is hers. She will complain of her pain and will refuse to walk because of it. In the midst of everything happening around her and all her confusion, there is one thing that she will always ask. Where is her purse?

How attached are we with the material things we own?

When the time comes that I will be stripped away with everything I have, my sanity, my possessions, and my security. Will there be something left deep inside me? What will be that one thing that I will be searching for repeatedly?

I pray that when those moments of darkness comes, I will continue to rely to the Lord and not on other things that will keep me astray. I desire to have an unselfish heart that seeks something that will benefit others and not just myself. I dream of that day when I won’t be described by things I have or have accomplished but instead by how I interact with people around me, the relationships I’ve made and the faith I live by.

I know that dreaming; desiring and praying for it are not enough. It will take a lot of time for sure, but with little steps, it is still attainable.

Goal: To be known by what you truly are and not by things you have or titles you’ve achieved. To have a heart that seeks for the Lord, a heart that doesn’t rely from the mind.

#challengeaccepted

(July 7, 2016)

The gospel reading last Monday from Matthew 9:18-26, got me into reflection. When the official went to Jesus and told Him that his daughter just died, but still asked Jesus to come and save her, the official showed an immense faith. When the lady with hemorrhage for 12 years touched Jesus’ cloaked and believed that she will be healed, it was her faith that healed her.

In our daily life, how many times do we pray and ask for something yet still doubts if the Lord really understood us or if the Lord will actually answer our prayers? How many times do we even bargain with our Lord just to make sure that He will grant our requests? “Lord let me have this and that, and I promise I will do this and that,” sounds familiar? Sure do for me. I am guilty of doubting our Lord. I am guilty of being scared that what if our Lord will not hear my prayers? I am guilty of praying and even uttering “Your will be done, Lord” but still being fearful that I will still fail or I will be forsaken.

The reading reminded me that the miracles of Jesus always come with faith. It takes two to tango as what people say right? It takes 2 to make a relationship work. And it hit me; we are in a relationship with our Lord. It is not a one-way road where He is the only one reaching for us, and listening to our woes. Jesus requires us to trust Him, to believe Him, to have faith in Him before He answers our prayers. He wants to make sure that we are invested in this relationship as well. That we won’t abandon Him the moment we got our “requests” but instead, we stay and even use our answered prayers as an instrument to deepen our faith.

Our Lord is not a genie who will give us 3 wishes. We ask for His divine intervention, because we believe that our Lord is the architect of our lives. That He loves us and He would want only the best for us. That whatever happens is part of His greater plan for us. We lift up our prayers for we are mere human beings and we believe that He is the Lord our God, the creator of the universe and with Him nothing is impossible.

So every time we pray for something, claim it! Claim that Jesus will answer your prayers, not specifically right now, but in His own time. Have faith that He always hears you, and that He will never, ever abandon you.