True North Missionaries Journal

We had probably heard the words of Jesus in the gospel, “…anyone who wants to become great among you must be your servant, and anyone who wants to be first among you must be your slave.” We know that for Christians we have to be servant leaders. But knowing is not enough, we need to practice it.

Jesus said these words when He was about to go to Jerusalem to finish the mission the Father has entrusted on Him. It’s amazing how He insisted on his disciples the principle of servant-hood in leading the people on the last days of His life. For all His 33 years living the earthly life, he already experienced both the good and the bad society can offer. His eyes were open and His heart was fully aware of the injustices, corrupt practices and self-righteousness of the leaders in His time. He had seen leaders who were acting differently from what they were preaching. Experience and awareness convicts Jesus more to finish the mission He has in His hands because He knows the ills of the society can only be healed through the cross. Words are no longer enough; He has to be the living example of a life exactly opposite to what the leaders in His time are practicing.

Our own awareness of the injustices, corrupt practices and self righteousness should compels us to be just, pure, and righteous. We cannot just be dismayed with the ungodly situation, we have to turn our experience and awareness into action so like Jesus we can be living examples that His gospel is attainable and in fact can be practiced in this modern world.

I had long ago thought that as an areahead I had to show continuous strength and unwavering faith. It took many years before I changed this way of leading and I was able to show my brothers and sisters my weaknesses, my faults and my wounds..

I’ve heard about it several times before, I’ve seen it too.. People losing faith. It’s not an easy thing to witness and I never fully know how to respond when someone tells me that they are, other than to affirm the presence of God and His love for them.. but it’s difficult to believe you are loved when you feel hopelessly abandoned.

Even though you wouldn’t have been able to tell, the last few months have been the most difficult for me.

Although I told myself I wasn’t losing faith, my actions showed otherwise. While I still spoke to God, I felt that my words were floating up into the air and disappearing. You can’t really hear me..can you? My anger was contained but showed itself in ways that were uncharacteristic of my personality.

One morning, I stood there in my room and played the song Our God by Chris Tomlin(http://youtu.be/zlA5IDnpGhc) and as I started folding my clothes I started to sing.. I was alone in my house and my voice filled the rooms.. God You are higher, than any other. I sang the words loudly, believing in His greatness; that He is greater than my darkness. The words ran through me as I sang, and I believed each word as they left my mouth. The truth of those words scared every doubt and fear that had engulfed me. I stood there and I started to cry.. I cried out of frustration, out of anger, out of sadness.. and then I heard it..

“Have you lost your faith?”

“No God.. I’m holding onto it..”

All this time, I had felt as though I was losing faith.. I was doubting His love for me. When in fact, I was holding onto it.

The acknowledgement that you are losing faith doesn’t mean that you’re a hopeless cause.. The mere act of acknowledging it means that you’re still holding onto it.

This past Wednesday Campus based had an “End of the year event” in celebration for the beginning of summer for post-secondary students! 😀

it was blessed event 🙂
we went to mass, had lunch at Korean grill (nomnomnom) then.. instahunted! hehe
(instahunt is a team-based scavenger hunt that will require each team to find places in Downtown Toronto, take a team/solo picture with it, then post them on instagram)
Check out the pictures here:
—-> http://instagram.com/cbteamratchet
—-> http://instagram.com/cbteamyolo

it was amazing to see about 26 youths come out to the event.. knowing that campus based did not exist at one point (Praise the Lord! woot!)
(side note: for those who don’t know.. Campus based in GTA is still in it’s rebuilding stage and is not fully established but with the Grace of God campus is slowly reforming again #PG)

it was awesome to see the campus youths celebrating and enjoying the day..
to see them step up as leaders.. as they led everyone to the different locations and sites
to see them watch out for each other especially when some of us got lost or got left behind haha    and many more to enumerate hehe                                                                                               these small acts of love, enthusiasm and fun is an affirmation that the Lord is working in small ways to build the future adults of society.

I thank the Lord for continually telling and reminding me: “Don’t worry anak, place the seeds I gave you and just leave the rest to me. I got chu!”

Lord in this journey you have blessed me with.. I offer and place my worries, fear, joy and the victories in Your hands. It’s all You and for You. Amen.

 

Today, I spent the day catching up on work and marking a giant pile of worksheets, and as I was marking, all I could think of was how tedious and tiresome it was. Given the bountiful and overflowing blessings that The Lord has given me in the last two weeks, my work suddenly felt like a huge pain in the bum.

But as I continued, I felt The Lord tell me…

Whether you grow tired of it or not, this is my blessing to you, and your work serves as a blessing for others. Take responsibility; for this is the life that I have given you. Celebrate each blessing and know that, in each one of them, I am present.

#findme =)

Working in a profession that allows me to create small relationships with people comes with wisdom, knowledge, and charisma.  Its funny because most of the stories I hear are people who freely share to you about their life lessons and what they wished they did or didn’t do and others who don’t share much to you at all.

I was fortunate to receive some wisdom from a man who wants to share his life lesson.  The first thing he said to me was “Be humble.”  He was sharing how being humble in his past has led him to a happy life.  He said “in my job, although I’ve worked there for 30 years, very hard job, I did it with humility.”  He passed this lesson on to his children saying “In whatever you do, be humble.”  I can see he was very content.

This is like Paul’s letter to the Ephesians 4:1-6

I therefore, the prisoner in the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to the one hope of your calling, one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is above all and through all and in all.

I’m beginning to see more and more our Lord reveals himself through people.  What is the Lord asking from me?  He is asking me to take on my calling with humility, be gentle with your words, be patient with the people around you, and love them as you love me.

Lord, you are the ultimate giver to love and you are the most gentle person out there. Help me to be humble in everything I do, I ask for more humility, and patience. Amen