Restless

Much apologies for being late on another post, it really isn’t because I’m lazy or I forget. Honestly, I just don’t want to post something I haven’t put my all into.

But anyways, I’ve been so tired lately. Restless, you could say. You know how the saying goes, “Restless until I rest in You”. I really can affirm that especially in my service, family, friends etc etc…

Let’s take it a step further. Ever heard of the 15 Promises of the Rosary? Intriguing isn’t it?! I’ll leave it to you to look it up. Though it may not be new to some, to me its something that really has changed my relationship with Mama Mary.

With that said, I find it hard to end my day without the rosary. I think that’s something we tend to forget sometimes...that we seek the intercessions of the Saints, so lets not forget Mama Mary can do the same. Read those 15 promises. Devote yourself. Seriously, IT’S SO SIMPLE, and doesn’t even take more than an hour if you are in a hurry.

I really remember early early Monday morning. Like 5am, I’ve been up all night, and super super tired. Yet…still couldn’t sleep. All that was going through my head was, you’re forgetting someone. Boom. I remembered the 15 promises. Boom. Prayed the rosary. Immediately I felt at ease…just peaceful.

‘Mary having co-operated in our redemption with so much glory to God and so much love for us, Our Lord ordained that no one shall obtain salvation except through her intercession.’
–St. Alphonsus Maria de Liguori

There it finally is. Late reflection, but something through my days that have really been special. No metaphors, no similes, just wanting to get closer to the Holy Family.

Lord, allow me to never forget Your presence. Make me humble enough to always seek the intercession of Your Holy Family in heaven. I seek to know Your will. Lord, I offer my life to You.

Desiderio Domini

 

 

Our Signature

Yesterday at 1pm EST, Apple Inc. played a video to an eager audience to kickstart their annual worldwide developers conference.

Here’s a link to that video: http://www.apple.com/designed-by-apple/

In the keynote that followed, Apple’s CEO and senior staff took the stage to announce new products and updates to their popular mobile and desktop operating systems. As an Apple employee I was very excited to see what the company was up to, but in all that craziness, what struck me most about the presentation was how proud the entire staff was of their work.

Apple’s signature, “Designed by Apple in California” was proudly showcased at the end of the keynote.

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“what do we want people to feel?”

One of the many lessons I’ve learned from this community is that we’re not meant to keep our faith to ourselves. Who we are as people of faith is something that is meant to be shared, something to be proud of. So when I reflect on the work this community had enabled me to accomplish over the years I ask myself, “what do we want people to feel?” I’m left with a simple answer, joy.

“then we begin to craft around our intention”

In all aspects of my life, I’ve sometimes made compromises that confused convenience with excellence. Time constraints, poor communication, and unknown variables sometimes force our hand into making poor choices in this community, but if we’re really focused on our goal of bringing joy to others, “then we begin to craft around our intention”. If everything is centered around joy, then it will undoubtedly lead to God.

“only then do we sign our work”

In our desperate pursuit for God are we led to excellence. We need to give a firm YES in our decisions, but equally important can be a firm NO when we realize that God is calling us to search for a greater solution. When we are confident and soaked in God’s Holy Spirit, He will make the decision His own, and “only then do we sign our work”.

– Jesse R.
We are, young people being and bringing Christ wherever we are.

Extremely Favoured

Thirty minutes after my shift ended today, I walked into my director’s office with a heavy cloud looming over me, and no it wasn’t the one outside that’s been causing all this crazy rain here in the GTA. Approximately 23 days from today I will be hopping on a plane (again) but this time with my family.

I was sure that I’d be coming home with bad news today- that our upcoming family trip would cost me my job. We will be gone all of July which means that I’ll be missing out on my service for the Eastern True North Conference. Since I didn’t feel too comfortable with that, I started a novena for the Western True North Conference in Calgary that’s happening Mid-Aug. I’d be back just in time for that. I don’t know how it would be possible financially, but God has provided for me under worse conditions before. It doesn’t hurt to ask.

To put things in perspective, I was just granted a two month leave (MAR-MAY) even though I only started in September of last year. I’m only five weeks back in my classroom and here I was expecting my director to approve another sudden leave of absence. How was I going to explain to her that I needed 2 months….again?

———

I knew I had to call on Mama Mary so I did the rosary during my lunch break hoping that she’d send an extra serving of peace. She gave me that and a spoonful extra. Knowing how I am, I knew I’d find every excuse not to ask permission today. So I walked into the staff room, had a quick convo with God and He reassured me that no matter what the outcome would be, there was already a victory. Even if I was to lose my job, I would still have my family vacation.

In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths || Proverbs 3:6

Brothers & sisters, I walked out of that room not with storm clouds, but with sunshine and a double rainbow. I am extremely and irrevocably favoured by God. Not only did my director tell me that my leave would be approved, she made it very clear to me that she would ignore any talk of resignation. My classroom is secured. AGAIN. My job as a preschool teacher is on reserve.

That’s not all.

I will be receiving paid vacation time, which means that there’s an extra paycheque coming in while I’m gone. That amount is enough for a round trip ticket to Calgary.

“It’s never about whether or not YOU can provide for yourself. Faith is knowing that you have a God who can do wonders for you. Faith is knowing that He is of divine providence. It was never about you to begin with! So the next time you consider whether or not you can go, take your question to God first, and don’t let it just die with you. That’s the beauty about our relationship with the Lord. Sometimes we don’t even do anything yet he still showers us with abundant blessings. He still wants to keep capturing our hearts. He still wants to reach out to us. But first you have to allow yourself to see the ways in which he tries to reach out to you. All he needs is your Yes.” (July 19, 2012)

The Lord hasn’t stopped showing me how extremely favoured and extremely loved I am. He affirmed me just now by allowing me to reread that old blog post. Little did I know that the “yes” I gave 500 days ago would lead me here, walking on a path made wonderfully and beautifully paved straight for me. 

The Giver!

I will serve the Lord when He gives me “X”!

X = Being a favourable situation, person, object, grades, timetable, salary, co-workers, bosses, etc

How many times have I heard this in one-on-ones, in a random sharing, or when conversations focus on a person’s ” game plan” for his/her life. In fact most of the time I fall into this trap myself. I will serve the Lord when He has fixed my family’s finances. To give a talk when He has prepared for me the right conditions: no rain or snow, someone picks me up and takes me home, food is available, ample time for me to prepare preferably two weeks in advance, etc. When He gives me a good salary so I can save up for my future family.

While all of this is well and good, it is easy to fall into a trap of taking comfort in the gifts and blessings. That when these comforts are taken away, and for sure they will be, that our service suddenly stops because our parameters for service are taken away.

The gifts that the Giver gives are blessings and comforts that He bestows on us for us to better know and experience Him. The Giver is in fact infinite, and therefore His gifts can come in an infinite number of forms. His blessings can come in the form of a sunrise, in fact any person can sense God nature of how wondrous it is. But it takes a different kind of sensitivity to see the gifts in our day-to-day struggle. When deadlines are choking us. When our bosses are breathing down our necks in order to deliver our company’s needs. When our family members are sick. When relationships are tested. When moths come out of our wallets.

It is when our parameters of service change that our focus on the Giver allows us to be sensitive enough to see that the gifts He is giving us has changed. It is when we recognize these gifts that we come to know and experience Him better. Our focus then lies in the Giver of gifts, and not on the gifts themselves.

Our yes to Him is our yes to Him not because we say yes to what He gives us, but because it is Him we say yes to. Our service then becomes definite, purposeful, and unstoppable because the focus is on the Lord and on nothing else.

I will serve the Lord because He has given me “X”.

X = Himself

 

2 Corinthians 1:3-7

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken; for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.

Veni Sancte Spiritus.

Come Holy Spirit.

Consume us. Refine us. Purify us.

Fix our eyes on You.

Veni Sancte Spiritus.

Whom Shall I Fear?

As we grow more and more with the Lord, our paths start to become more clear. But along with that clarity comes the sight of a road full of challenges. As I have journeyed in my faith for almost 22 years now, I have experienced a fair share of these challenges. Roller coasters of emotion, doubt, happiness, and whatever other feelings/ emotions exist out there. Fears creep up and doubts begin to form, but in the middle of all my fears, the one thing that the Lord has constantly been revealing to me is that above all these fears, the fear of the Lord is greater. 

Fear of the Lord is the only fear that brings good things into your life. It doesn’t mean being afraid of Him so we have to hide and run away or be afraid of approaching Him, but the complete opposite. Fearing the Lord has made me realize and acknowledge that God truly is greater above all, and although He has the power to move mountains, He chooses to move our hearts instead. He chooses the way of love above all, and out of that great love, He chooses to deliver us from all other fears.

Somewhere along the way, I began to realize that I have stopped being afraid of thunder; I am much less afraid of the dark; and I no longer have a fear of pigeons. And although these are small fears, along with conquering some of my bigger fears like self-doubt and what not, I have realized that I owe it all to Him. As I have grown more in love with the Lord, the only fear I can really hold in my heart is losing Him and not having His love. But coming to this realization became a testimony to the change in me, possible only through Him.

Looking back through it all and even to this day, His Word and His plan has become clearer and clearer each and every time. Through all my fears, I found His love, and in His love, I am no longer bound by my fears. Through it all, I cannot help but give myself to Him and trust Him with all that I have and grow in His love in all that He gives me. To have love… His love… is to grow and to change to live a life, pleasing to the Lord.

Deo Gloria!

Blessed

I shared this story with the National Core Team members yesterday.  At last Sunday’s mass, the deacon giving the homily told a story of a young man who experienced and survived a heart attack.  This led him to reflect on his life and how he had neglected both his spiritual and family lives.  His life was focused on the pursuit of money and material things; in fact he was consumed by it.  The deacon described him as the “walking dead”.

We know of the walking dead or “zombies” as the living dead, physically alive but empty inside devoid of any emotions, mental and spiritual capacity.  But come to think of it, many times we focus on the worldly things, we become like zombies, immersing ourselves with things that suck out the things that are truly life-giving.

After the sermon, the priest called a couple who were celebrating the 62nd wedding anniversary. 62nd!!! Amazing!!  The priest asked them for two favours.  First, that the husband continue to open the doors for his wife.   Second, that the couple continue to pray together every day.

I praise God that through Couples for Christ, I am able to live that full life that the Lord wants each and every one of us to have.  Service keeps my wife and I busy, but by serving together, we are actually able to spend time with each other, doing the same things, sharing the same passions.  Serving in the Family Ministries has allowed us to be there for our boys as well, watching them grow in their faith, building friendships with other youths.

Yesterday, after our National Core meeting, I was able to catch up and play basketball with my boys.  Although my body isn’t what it used to be, I didn’t mind being “schooled” by my boys.  Last night, I asked my youngest son, Jak-jak, if I was a good dad.  And he replied “you’re a great dad!”.

My net worth may not be much on paper, but the treasures that I have been blessed with are far more greater than any riches this world can offer.

Thank you Lord, you are truly an amazing God!

Not A Coincidence

The Lord really knows how to love us. He knows what our heart really desires. He knows what makes us tick. He knows how to challenge us. He knows what’s best for us. He knows what we need, when we need it.

I’ve been asked by the Lord to do a few things that I never thought I would or could do. I said YES without any hesitation for some, but at some point or another, have questioned whether or not it was the right decision. But every time I question my YES, the Lord affirms me that I made the right choice.

When I said YES to MV, I actually just decided to stop saying no to FTPW. Never really felt a tug to be a missionary but I figured there’s no harm in discerning about it. I was right. There is no harm in discerning about it. But through my discernment, the Lord showed me reasons to say YES.

Every YES we give is an opportunity for us to experience God’s love in our life. It’s not a coincidence that we feel more loved by God when we give ourselves to Him in our YES. Sometimes it’s not easy to see. Sometimes we don’t see it til days, months, or years after. But believe me, the Lord knows how to love us. And it’s not a coincidence that we are exactly where we are right now. Thank God we are experiencing consolation. Thank God that we are experiencing desolation. The Lord wants us to experience Him. The Lord wants us where we are right now so He can love us.

Lord, help me accept things as they are. Everything that comes from You is good and is for my own good. I may not understand it now, but I know that You love me. Help me to recognize your love for me in my life.