Write the vision; make it plain upon tablets, so he may run who reads it. For still the vision awaits its time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie. If it seem slow, wait for it will surely come, it will not delay. -Habakkuk 2:2-3
Fulltime Training seems like yesterday, yet from then on the vision of the Lord had been revealed and fulfilled in its own time. The Lord never fails. He is a promise keeper.
Thank you Lord for the gift of mission and the privilege of serving You. Amen.
Ever since I was assigned to the Vancouver cluster for my mission assignment as a mission volunteer I would have never thought of loving the cluster itself. I always saw Vancouver as my mission area, and that was it. During the Leader’s Enrichment Retreat in Squamish I was showed wrong. Serving and witnessing the passion and growth of my mission area was humbling. I witnessed the hope each household member wanted to see happen in their households and how much love and compassion they had for God. Vancouver is in good hands, God’s hands, and I believe that the Lord will forever be present within each and every household. Although my 2 years of being an MV is coming close to an end, my mission area Vancouver will continue to stay close in my prayers. This cluster has allowed me to stay patient, love humbly, and hope endlessly. Within my service as an MV and serving as the 100% free advocacy head I don’t have a lower household to pastor but Vancouver has blessed me with sisters who I love and mentor and that’s all I could ever ask for. Each sister imitates Mother Mary in their own way of service, independent, strong, and so beautifully made, these women of Christ. The Lord is truly gracious and deserving of all of my love. As His servant, I’m proud to say that I love my mission area. I love the Vancouver cluster and I pray that every brother and sister who serves in Vancouver may witness the love this cluster has for one another and the love they have for Christ.
Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam
I am nothing without the Lord.
Here you will find darkness. Darkness is not really an actual thing, is it? The word is only a classification of what happens when there is no light present. Light is a real thing. How? Simply put, light can be produced, where as darkness cannot. For example, if I light a match a flame (light) is produced. There is nothing in this world that can create darkness. Darkness only occurs when light is not present.
So darkness then, does not really exist. Furthermore, darkness would definitely not exist if light didn’t exist because darkness itself is dependent on light.
In the same way I find that this is an exact representation of the self. The self would not exist if a something did not exist. Humanity exists solely because of the One who exists.
Therefore, if humanity is solely dependent on our Creator, the beginning statement is incorrect, for we cannot even be anything without the Lord. Instead it should be..
Without the Lord.
.. because “I am nothing” indicates that we are actually something when the Lord is not present. Now, where am I going with this?
Sometimes I am thanked, praised, honoured for the things the Lord has allowed me to do, whether that would be for giving a talk, paying for someone’s meal, leading worship. It is hard sometimes because the devil uses opportunities like these to slowly and subtly build up my pride. Most of the time, I only notice when it is already too late and I have already acted wrongly against my family, friends, or any brother or sister.
Praise God for He is merciful and without His unending love I would be a wreck. When we say “Praise God” in this community, we are truly called to acknowledge that the Lord is the source of everything; every act of goodness, every smile, every joyful moment, every inch of love, the completeness of our life (which is why it is EXTREMELY easy to get “kiligs” or feel “gitty” over the Lord!). Praise God because He is the only One worthy of praise. Obviously, our praising does not really amount to much when we compare it to God’s infinite and undefinable Glory. However, if there is any praise or thanks being done, it all should be directed to the Lord.
I have been so extremely blessed, that the Lord has chosen to use me (as He has chosen all of us) and make my life an instrument of His love and joy. The only way to increase in the fullness of my life, is to rid myself of everything that is of me. The more that the self is removed, the more the Creator can be present. Of course we strive to give ourselves fully, but we are such limited creatures (and the Lord is aware of this, He is our Creator after all) that even if we desperately desired to offer ourself completely it would be impossible; because to offer oneself fully is to be a perfect reflection of God (and there is only one, Christ). So as much as we strive to give ourselves fully and be perfectly transformed into a bright light..
We must be at peace with the fact that we will never reach this state in this lifetime and know that the Lord has already took this into account when He created us. So instead we must settle for this..
.. and remember that even if this is the best (as long as we try our best) that we can do, it is still indescribably beautiful because the Lord made it that way. He will make us strong despite our frailty. He will fix us despite our brokenness. He will make us complete because His love never fails.
Many things in this world grow: grass, hair, people, and many other countless things you can name. So, why doesn’t, say a chair, grow? Because it has no life, which we therefore need life in order to grow.
But even before that, we MUST CHOOSE to GROW. We must choose to grow in the spirit so we can experience happiness and reach heaven. Some people say the saying, “You learn something new everyday,” but I believe as Catholics – We are called to grown in holiness with the Lord each and every day and learn something new from Him so that we experience Him more and more. How do we do that? Through prayer, sacraments, service to others, (family, work, MV Discernment Program, FT pastoral work, religious life, etc.), going for religous life and / or whatever God calls us to be.
But all of these things have one thing in common: YOU WILL NEVER REACH THE FULL POTENTIAL OF GROWTH IN ANY OF THESE AREAS WITHOUT OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST.
In the name of Our Lord Jesus Christ, we thank you Father for constantly pursuing us and directing us to grow in love with you. With the intercession of Mother Mary, we glorify our lives for you and ask for all the saints in heaven to help pray for us. Amen.
As part of my preparations for conference (and really this year), I have been reflecting on John 2:5 “Do whatever He tells you”.
This week, the Lord has really revealed to me this message:
Why do you run away from My perfect Love?
My take away from this has been to immerse myself in prayer and the sacraments. Through this, I know that I am embracing God’s love and filling my jar to the brim. This is ultimately what He wants for me and what gives me joy in my life – His love. Praise God!
“…open the eyes of my heart Lord, I want to see you….”
Lord, you have blessed us with 42 at Camp Witness! I’m not too sure why it didn’t dawn upon me earlier but the last time I was present at a camp of 42, it was when I joined CFC Youth. Almost 13 years ago you called 42 of your children in Winnipeg to attend a YFC camp named Exodus. Today I stand in a room very similar to the one I once stood in being exactly like these youth, not knowing where my involvement with this group would go.
But you knew! Imagine this, Winnipeg has sent 5 of their very own to train and become full-time pastoral workers and ALL 5 of them were present at camp Exodus. Arnold Rodriguez (my God father aka ninong) was the young area head at the time of the camp and was overseeing it. Dexter Suban was the camp head and (ate) Rina Castillo was one of the facilitators. Janice Tolledo-Banaria and myself were mere participants at the time. Only YOU knew!
I truly believe that it’s providential that this camp was called WITNESS. In the very details of it, I could see and feel our Lord’s presence. In witnessing these new participants complete their camp it allowed me to witness my own story and how it’s come full circle.
As I look at these young and beautiful faces, I cannot even begin to fathom your plans for them. This very feeling compels me to want to kneel in awe at your wonderful works! Amongst these 42, there may be ftpws, nuns, priests, future mothers and fathers and blessed singles. It humbles me to know that you would use me to call your children back to you.
Lord, you are limitless and you orchestrated all of this to achieve purpose in all our lives. You have breathed your Holy Spirit in all of us once again and have allowed us to physically see your harvest; how real it is, how real they are! Thank you Lord for showing me this. Thank you for holding our hearts and feeding our souls. Thank you for this walk down memory lane. Thank you for this call!
I find that when I’m thankful, I’m loving. When I’m unthankful, I’m unloving. For me, it’s hard to receive and love the best I can without first being full of thanksgiving.
Before I went to the Philippines for training, I took a lot for granted. My weakness was being able to love and be loved. Though I was in a very loving community and came from a very loving family, still, my heart was not truly, genuinely, loving. It was because I was ungrateful. The most important lesson I learned from immersing for three months in the Philippines, training to be a full-time lay missionary, was how to be thankful.
I was so used to a comfortable life. I was two years into my career as a Graphic/Web Designer and made enough to be independent and comfortable. Also, I was now making money for doing something I did for fun. In a worldly sense, I was fulfilled, but I wasn’t truly thankful. The material abundance in my life distracted me from being thankful for the invisible things: relationships, virtues, grace, …love. Being a leader in the community I served, I was more focused on production and results rather than building relationships. I mean, I had a good relationship with my household and a few others here and there, but I was selective, and that’s the farthest it went. I settled for mediocre relationships so that it wouldn’t be so hard. I thought that investing in people wasn’t worth the sacrifices I would have to make on my end. It would mean less time for me and the things I wanted in life.
Despite all of this and my hardened heart, the Lord was still so faithful. He still inspired holy inclinations and desires within me. He still gave me the grace to follow Him and draw closer to Him. He still affirmed me of His love even in the midst of my sinfulness. He led me to discern to give my life to him as a lay missionary, and He gave me the grace to answer His call. It would take another post to share how faithful He was throughout my discernment, but let’s just say that He never stopped knocking at my door. He never stopped affirming me of His love, and He never stopped forgiving me of my sins. This only led my heart to be opened to Him more and more. I found myself so caught up in Him, so much that I was compelled to say YES to fully surrender to Him and allow Him to use me fully.
I encountered Jesus in a way never before when I immersed in the Philippines. Last time I visited was for a family vacation 6 years prior to my return. However, this time around I was there for mission and I encountered Jesus like never before in the poor. My most profound experience was when I stayed at an ANCOP village for three days. I will never forget the family I stayed with, the youth I met, the kids I played with, and the generosity they showed me. They humbly taught me what’s truly important in life, and that’s simply Love. Love in it’s most real and raw form. The message continued all throughout my time in the Philippines, and the Lord blessed my heart so much.
The more I surrendered, the more I was blessed. And that is still the case now, now that I’ve been two years living this life as His missionary. He has blessed me, my family, and all my relationships all the more, and He has pruned my life so that it could bear even more fruit. It has been the most challenging, beautiful struggle, but I can rest assured it’s the path of holiness He’s set me on. It’s the path that is leading me closer to Him and the salvation of my soul.
My brothers and sisters, let’s always be thankful …and joyful! We have Christ in our hearts. We are His Church. We are part of a communion of saints with multitudes upon multitudes praying for us. We have His Sacraments. We have His real presence in the Holy Eucharist. What more could we ask for?
Eucharist means “thanksgiving”. When we receive Jesus, we are filled with thanksgiving! To live a Eucharistic life is to live a life of thanksgiving, believing that God has given everything we need (and more), and most especially the Holy Spirit through Jesus Christ.
He has blessed us in superabundance, overflowing so that we can share the blessings! How can we not be thankful?
Thankfulness helps us to focus on what has already been given rather than what we want. Thus, it helps us focus on the Lord through the people and everything He’s given in our lives. Even if we’re very sinful, we can still be very thankful. Being thankful simplifies our desires—it helps us to desire and see only Him in everyone and everything.
Lord Jesus Christ, giver of all that is good, thank You for my life. In all my shortcomings and weaknesses, please help me to always be thankful. Thank you for all the people that I share this life with. Thank you for providing for all my temporal needs as a lay missionary. Most of all, thank You for the fullness of Your Love and Your graces! With these I will be rich enough and desire nothing more. Amen.