Looking back at my 2018, I can honestly say it’s been a great year, one that I haven’t had in a while. If you’ve read my previous blogs or heard me share in a household then you know the past couple of years were challenging to say the least. So what changed this year? Well first, I won’t say that this year didn’t come with its fair share of challenges and struggles. But perhaps what was different was my attitude and ultimately my trust in God.
At the beginning of last year I was at a rock bottom place and I had nothing left to do but to give God my everything and just trust Him. Thinking about it, it feels like a life time ago, a lot truly can happen within a year. I promised to keep God at the center of my life. I started attending daily mass, praying the rosary daily and going to adoration regularly. If I needed to receive reconciliation I wouldn’t wait or hide, within a matter of days I would find myself in the confessional booth. That is a huge improvement from the previous years where it would take me a week, sometimes weeks of not receiving the Eucharist, not only because of shame and guilt, but because of my hectic schedules. It’s hard for me now to fathom not making time for God a top priority. In addition to indulging in the sacraments I tried to journal more and use it as my personal prayer time. These have been challenging yet the best days that I have had in a while.
Perhaps I am starting my year again with nothing else to do but trust the Lord. Except this time, I can’t fathom why I would try to do it any other way. With the start of a new year brings promise and hope. For a while it’s been with the hope that “it can’t get any worse” and the promise that “it will get better.” This year I start it with the hope that I will be successful in the eyes of the Lord and the promise that I will do my best and give my all in trusting God in all circumstances.
Believe me it is a lot easier said than done. I still have a lot of fears, things I need to work on personally and yes, most definitely staring into the future can be scary because of the unknown. But when I start to get scared or overwhelmed I realize it’s because I am trying to plan and control my future.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11
That bible verse was probably the first verse I’ve ever memorized and took to heart. Whenever people would ask me, what’s your favourite verse, this is my go to. What was most evident last year, the biggest gift, tool and benefactor I have is both God and prayer. My prayer life had a huge level upgrade in 2018, not because I set it as my goal, but rather it was truly my life line. I found myself in situations not knowing what to do or how I would get there. Prayer didn’t only move mountains for me, it brought me halfway around the world and back to the foot of literal mountains more grand than I could ever imagine. And so this year I look forward to expanding my favourite bible verse and to wholeheartedly focus on this next part which continues,
12 “Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” – Jeremiah 29:12-13
It’s going to be an interesting year, or so I hope – nay, so I pray! I pray I may be able to listen and hear God’s plan and will for me. I pray that I may have the courage to stand up for Christ and all that I believe in. I pray that I may be humble to accept all struggles and victories that may come my way. I pray that I may be open to trusting and seeking God with all my heart. I pray for you reading this, dear brothers and sisters, that no matter where you are in life that you will be open to allowing God to meet you where you are and as you are. May we all be open to receiving God’s Divine Mercy, Amen.
Here’s to a Happy and Blessed New Year!
Merry Christmas!
In Christ,
Meagan Webb