Monday, August 15, 2016
Today is my last day as the Sister Area Head for CFC-Youth Edmonton. It is also my last day being a CFC-Youth member now that I don’t have a service role in the CFC-Youth Edmonton Core Group. It’s true — I’m still a Mission Volunteer and I still get the opportunity to attend SHOUT and other events, but wow, how different my life is going to be in the next month!
I’ll no longer be leading PFTs, sister households, service meetings, and I won’t be conducting any one-on-one’s anymore. It hasn’t really hit me yet. But wow, again, how different my life will be! My life is no longer going to be predictable, especially now that I’ve graduated from university. It’s no longer going to be about the next event that we have to plan for, or the talk or the meeting minutes that I’ll need to prepare each month.
At a time like this, I can be easily tempted to be worried and scared for what’s to come. And believe me, that is kind of what I’m going through right now. But this is a great opportunity for me to give thanks to God for blessing me with such a beautiful and wholesome upbringing in the CFC-Youth community.
I’ve been so fortunate to have grown up in this community, where I’ve learnt the most incredible truth: God loves me and has a plan for me (Talk 1 of the Youth Camp). With this truth is the gift of knowing that God exists and that He wants to have a personal relationship with me. He wants me to free me from this world and He wants me to reject its countless empty promises. I’ve been so blessed that God chose this community to help me discover who I really am. I am His beloved. I am not made for this world, but my citizenship is in Heaven.
I praise God that I’ve found my identity in Him. I know and see what’s going on in the world each day. I know that there are millions of people who do not believe He is alive or have so many doubts about who they are, what their purpose is, or why they exist. There are so many questions that come into a person’s mind that are left unanswered because they don’t have the proper guidance, support, and community to lead them. So I don’t take it lightly when I say that it’s truly a miracle that God has chosen me and not somebody else. I could have been an atheist or an agnostic, but that wasn’t God’s plan for me.
I give praise to God for the people who invited me to this community. Thank you Dad and Mom. I know it’s been nine years since our whole family has been active in the CFC Family Ministries, but you have given me the best gift a parent could give a child, and that is hope in Jesus Christ. As much as I love you both for all of your sacrifices, love, and support, I thank you most for teaching me how to pray at a young age, for ensuring I was baptized and confirmed, and for encouraging me to join CFC-Youth 12.5 years ago. Thank you for using your hard-earned money to pay for my registration fees to all of the camps, conferences, summits, SHOUTS, and immersions that I attended. Thank you for being my CCs when I was still a teenager in junior high.
I thank God for my two older sisters who were the first people to set an example for me in CFC-Youth even before I joined. Thank you for paving the way for me. Thank you for your service in the South Chapter, HSB, and Area. I am so thankful to God for giving me sisters who have supported me in my service through prayers or through words of encouragement and affirmation. I am blessed to have a family that loves God.
I give thanks to God for those who served at my CFC-Youth Youth Camp, especially the team leaders and my facilitator. Thank you Sam, Kat, and Mesh for giving me the opportunity to encounter Jesus in a very personal way. It was there that I met Jesus and knew it. And it changed my life forever.
I am so blessed by God for all of leaders in CFC-Youth Edmonton, especially my household heads who have prayed for me and mentored me in the past 12.5 years. Thank you Janine for calling me to go to events and helping me say yes to serve in KFC Core (or ROCK). Thank you Ate Rieza for believing in me, not just in my service as a Chapter Head but as a person. I continually refer to your example of love and boldness when I serve. Thank you Lara for teaching me patience and bravery, and thank you for believing that I could be an Advocacy Head and an Area Head. Your friendship means a lot to me. Thank you Ate Evs for teaching me that God is a merciful God, who will accept me as I am, and not who I think I should be. Thank you for being an example of true humility, and for helping me in my discernment as a Mission Volunteer.
I am thankful for the sisters (especially in my households) and the brothers (especially my counterparts) that I’ve served with so closely. A huge shout out to everyone I’ve served with in the CFC-Youth Edmonton Core Group. I am so grateful to God for all of your life-giving friendships. Thank you for believing in me and trusting me. With all of you, the journey has been so colourful and full of laughter and joy. Your yes’s have always inspired me to say yes. Thank you for truly being the Heart Beat of CFC-Youth Edmonton.
I praise God for CFC Edmonton and all of the CCs that have been like second parents to me, especially my own parents (lol), Uncle Au and Auntie Monica, Tito Nap and Tita Ely, Tito Charlie and Tita Edna, Tito Cesar and Tita Beth, Kuya Anthony and Ate Maan, Tito Jaymar and Tita Sheila, Tito Chris and Tita Baby, and Tito George and Tita Evs. To these CCs and all of the CCs that have ever served me, you’ve all been such huge supporters of my growth as a CFC-Youth. Without you, there is no CFC-Youth. Without you, all of us young people would be lost, not knowing and not experiencing the love of God. Thank you for your service!
I am thankful to the Lord for all CFC-Youth Full-Time Pastoral Workers who have set foot in the Mountain Region and have set an amazing example to the youth and for inspiring them to be and bring Christ wherever they are. I praise God for all of the FTPWs, but thank you Ate Evs, Anton, Kuya Miguel, Ate Candy, Kuya Gelo, Kevin, Ate Hannah, Kuya Dexter, Ate Grace, Kuya Butch, Kuya John, Ate Madel, Ate Checa, Kuya Ghamay, Kuya Yroll, and now Niccolo for all of your sacrifices and service. Thank you for playing a huge role in my life.
I praise God for all of the priests and religious sisters that have helped me in my formation as a Catholic, both during a CFC-Youth event or apart from it, especially those who have given me such sound advice on how to love myself, others, and God more. Without question, I wouldn’t know Jesus’ merciful love if it weren’t for Father Mike, Father Jim, Father Matthew, Father Vu, Father Miguel, Father Martin, Father Kris, and Father Mark. Also, thank you Sister Mae and the Sisters of Providence for always praying for me. Thank you all for responding to the call!
Twelve and half years have flown by and goodness, there have been times when I felt like the only option was to quit. I can recall different years where I had a difficult time moving on from feeling abandoned, betrayed, misled, anxious, or just trying to overcome feeling like I wasn’t enough or that I was too much. Although each year had its own set of difficulties and struggles, it would be an enormous mistake if I ignored the joy I found in suffering for God. It was at my lowest points that I’ve felt closest to God. Even the times when I couldn’t feel anything, I knew God was with me. God can do anything and He can heal anyone, no matter how deep the wounds are.
It was in the suffering that God pushed me to grow and formed in me virtues like patience, compassion, humility, piety, and mercy. The most difficult of these to develop was definitely mercy, but the Lord has a crazy way of showing me up; He once said,
“If I can forgive the inexcusable in you, you can forgive the inexcusable in others.”
Boom. So beautiful, freeing, and true!
For myself, one of the greatest challenges I’ve experienced in CFC-Youth Edmonton was seeing the area fall before my eyes in 2007. Since then, CFC-Youth Edmonton has been rebuilding from the ground up. However, what used to be a barren desert is now a youthful, vibrant community whose foundation is truly Christ. We are no longer in our “dark ages” but living in the light of Christ.
I leave CFC-Youth Edmonton having the most troubling yet peaceful transition. It is troubling because a part of me wants to hold onto something that has been so good to me for over half of my life. But it is a peaceful transition knowing that the new CFC-Youth Edmonton Core Group, the new Heart Beat, is comprised of youth who are stronger and more faithful than I ever was at their age.
I rarely went to weekday mass or confession when I was 16 or 18 or 20 years old. But for these youth it’s almost like second nature to them; they just know that in order to have a strong foundation in Christ, they can’t just be active in the community, but they need to be active Catholics in the Church. They are prepared, equipped, and ready to be the Lord’s hands, feet, and heart to the area. What more can I ask for? There is nothing left. God has made it easy for me to let go.
I am moving on from CFC-Youth with so much gratitude because God has been so faithful to all of my friends. Today they’re no longer youth, but adults now, joining SFC, getting engaged, some soon to be married. I have friends who have graduated university, who are moving away to grad school or medical school, and many are landing new jobs and opportunities. In the past year, God has given us more reasons to trust in His love and His plan for us than He ever has before in our lives. We’ve reached a beautiful point where God keeps blessing us with more and inviting us to receive more. We are at such a good place in our lives despite the uncertainty of what our future holds. Personally, I take delight in knowing that God holds and owns my future, and that He is already there waiting for me.
“Fear not, for I am with you always.”
-Isaiah 41:10
I spent this day, my last day as a CFC-Youth, trying my best to offer it to the Lord. I went to work. I spent about 40 minutes in adoration, went to mass on the Solemnity of the Assumption of Mary. I was able to go to confession and walk through the Holy Doors. I walked to the River Valley and spent some more time in prayer with God. I talked to some of the sisters in my household on the phone. When I arrived home, I greeted my parents with a hug and a kiss. Today was just a beautiful and wholesome day, very reflective of my life growing up as a CFC-Youth.
Everything that I’ve learnt about faith, hope, love, service, virtue, community, the Church, prayer, the saints, angels, Mother Mary, evangelization, advocacy and social justice, and family create in me my identity in Christ. No matter where I go, I pray that I will do my best to embody all of the things I’ve learnt in CFC-Youth and apply these same teachings in Singles For Christ. After all, I’m still a big sister to the youth. Moving onto a different ministry doesn’t change that. Although I won’t be leading as many activities as I used to as an Area Head, I pray that God may keep me a CFC-Youth at heart so that I can continue to strive to be and bring Christ wherever I go.
Thank You God for everything. For my life. For my family. For this community. For the opportunity to serve You. For the Church. For my work. I am amazed by Your love, Lord. Thank You for the best last day. Amen.
Our Lady of Guadalupe, pray for us.
St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us.
St. Joseph, pray for us.
#campSWAT #stayworthyandtrue
