Wednesday, March 11, 2015
I encountered God in a way I had never before at my CFC-Youth camp on March 12-14, 2004 (11 years ago tomorrow). I heard God speak though Scripture, but I wasn’t listening; I didn’t know He was speaking directly to me. I saw Christ present in the Holy Eucharist, but I didn’t know or notice He was looking straight at me.
When I look back to this weekend, I realize now that God was greatly pursuing me even though I was totally blind to it. Even though I had no clue, He still made a way for me to realize it; after my youth camp, I was a different person from when it first began. I wanted to change and I wanted to tell people about Christ, and I did this the Monday I returned to school. A light switch turned from off to on and I just knew that it was God who said I was really ready to know that I loved Him and, more importantly, that He loved me.
As I ponder upon my journey since my youth camp to this particular moment in time, I can’t help but smile widely because I’m beginning a brand new journey with God, knowing (again) that I still love God and that God has, will always, and currently loves me more than I could ever imagine.
Becoming a CFC-Youth Mission Volunteer has been a mere thought for many years, but wondering if I was called to full-time pastoral work for CFC-Youth has been a reoccuring thought since I was 16 years old. That said, I’m unbelievably grateful that I am here today. Regardless of the outcome of the Mission Volunteer Program, I’m excited to learn as to why this desire still remains in my heart. I’m confident in saying that there is something that God wants me to discover. There is something He wants me to experience. And He wants me to do it all with Him!
As excited as I am, I would be lying if I said I was completely cool, calm, and collected because I can’t help but feel fear, doubt, and anxiety, especially when I also have other reoccurring thoughts and desires. For now, I find confidence, consolation, perseverance, and trust in God, whom continuously reminds me:
“Fear not for I am with you always.” -Isaiah 41:10
(Anchor verse for CFC Youth Canada’s National Conference in 2004 AKA my “life verse” haha)
In whatever this journey has in store, God’s assurance is the greatest assurance through it all, and I pray that I may cling to Him readily like a child does to their father and/or mother.
As I embark on this crazy new journey,
I pray that the the wood of the boat I remain in be made of the Cross of my Lord and my God, Jesus Christ.
I pray that the wind which directs my sail be the Spirit, my only and precise Guide.
I pray that the ocean be the Father’s deep love and mercy that keeps me afloat from falling into sin.
Praise be to the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
Our Lady of Guadalupe, pray for us.
St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us.
Amen.
