A few days ago I had been invited for a mass and dinner downtown with the Sisters of St. Joseph through a good friend. I was duly looking forward to it when I heard about it weeks in advance. Though I was a bit worried and hesitant when the day actually came. This past week we’ve been experiencing extreme freezing weather, strong gusty winds combined with a heavy snow fall, making it even more difficult and longer to get around the GTA than usual. It was so bad the previous night that I wasn’t allowed to go to household due to extremely poor visibility on the roads. The weather forecast called for something similar again, so I was skeptical my parents would allow me out. Plus a small part of me just didn’t want to leave the house in the cold, and I really don’t like going downtown unless I have to, if I’m being honest.
Yet something was urging me to go despite whatever reasons I had in favour not to. I had been feeling quite slummy for the past week or so, and I’m not really sure why. I had already missed morning mass, so the promise of mass before dinner was the driving factor, I knew despite whatever happened it would be worth it if I was able to attend mass. Surprisingly after a bit of back-and-forth, my parents said yes. But by that time, 2 hours before the start of the mass, I had to rush and hurry if I were to make it in time!
For those of you who don’t know, it can require multiple different transit systems to make it to the core of downtown, depending where you are coming from. Luckily I got a drive to the train station, so I only had to take 2 modes of transit systems. As I hopped out the car and was hastily heading to the ticket booth to load my presto card, a young man – probably around my age – asked if I had spare change. I didn’t stop to answer, I was talking while I sped walked. I said no, I only have debt. He then asked if I would be willing to buy him a ticket to Union Station (which is where I was heading). Without thinking much I said sure, by this point I was already past him and not making eye contact. I heard him pause before he asked, “did you say yes?” I turned slightly as I got to the door and said louder, “yes!” The young man quickly jogged over to my direction, plastic bag in tow, and followed me up to the counter. As we were walking he said, thank you. As I approached the counter I confirmed with him it was Union Station, he said yes and asked if I would be able to get a round-trip for him. I paused for half a second before saying no and asked him if that’s okay. He said, “That’s fine! Thank you! I will say a prayer for you!” His words caught me off guard, quite literally made me stutter in action as I was paying for the ticket. I took the ticket from the sales person and handed it to the man. I then turned around and asked to load my presto, the lady asked how much. I looked at the man who I had just bought the ticket for and did a rough calculation for a round trip. Fare prices had gone up, but to be honest it still felt reasonable cheaper than I thought in the moment. I really could have bought him a round trip, I thought about it but he was walking away and I only had a minute before my train came. So I pushed away all thoughts in order to focus and run for my train.
I came out of the underground tunnel and was running up the stairs as the train pulled in. I got on and went to the top floor to sit. Moments later the same man I had bought the ticket for came running up the stairs. Part of me wished I really did have change to give him to get back home, but I didn’t. Part of me thought why not at least go sit with him and talk a bit, but I didn’t. Part of me wanted to react or do something, but I didn’t. Instead I sat and had a hard time praying the rosary as my head was flooded with thoughts and distractions.
I finally made it where I was supposed to be in Toronto, 5 minutes past the start of mass. It was at a house and it was my first time there so I didn’t know what to do. If it was warmer I probably would have resolved to awkwardly wait outside until mass finished; the thought did cross my mind. But it was ridiculously cold and I knew this was not the way I wanted to die, so I faintly knocked, and thankfully someone opened the door and welcomed me in.
Even though I was slightly late, it turns out they were waiting anyway because they expected people to trickle in a bit with the weather. After I settled it wasn’t too long until we began, we all had hymn books and the opening hymn was “Here I am, Lord.” There is just so much that this song means to me personally, and I haven’t heard it at a mass in what feels like forever. But surprisingly it was the second time I was hearing it during a daily mass within a week and it stirred my heart each time. Upon reflecting on the gospel of the day, Mark 3:31-35, I understood in a different light when Jesus said: “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.”
Contextually I can break it down and apply it to my life in very tangible, relative ways. But I’m going to talk about the way it made me think about the man from the train station. If one of my siblings, or even one of my friends, asked me to spot them for a train ticket, I would do it and I would have bought them a round-trip without hesitation. Even though I realized I could have done better for the man, I could have corrected it by buying him the return once we got to Union Station. But I got caught up in my own haste and easily annoyed at the selfish, pushy, impatient rush hour crowd. I know I don’t owe this man anything really, but how could I not help if I have the means, especially in this weather. Though I am financially tight, I could have spare an extra ticket and trust the Lord will help me recover the cost when I need it the most. Because that is what the Lord does, he takes care of us and gives us what we need, when we need it the most. In fact, not only then, he blesses us and answers our prayer a hundred fold. The Lord is limitless in His giving to me, so how can I be so wicked as to limit my giving to others.
I pray the young man was able to do whatever he needed to do and get back home safe and warm. I pray he may never be afraid to offer up prayers for others. I pray that others will help my family in their times of need. I pray that I may never be greedy and always limitless in my giving, whenever I have the means and in whatever ways I may be able to do so. Amen.
In Christ through Mary,
Meagan Webb