“Temperance brings about a spiritual beauty that in many ways overflows into the body, especially the face of a person. A woman might be, from a strictly physical point of view, stunningly beautiful and a perfect candidate for a successful modeling career. But often it happens that after a few months of conversation with such persons, their beauty thins out and begins to ring hallow. As Thomas writes: “a thing may be becoming according to the senses, but not according to reason.” Conversely, the appearance of an average looking woman can begin to acquire a beauty and attraction that is not immediately evident from a consideration of her physical features alone. This is the spiritual beauty that comes from the excellence and honorable state resulting from the cultivation of the virtue of temperance, the beauty of a heart that recoils from the disgrace that is contrary to temperance and a love of the honor that belongs to it; in short, the beauty of an unselfish heart.”
The Virtue of Temperance, found here
“The beauty of an unselfish heart.” (: Wow. I’ve been reflecting a lot on what it means to be disciplined in my desires. I can recall the many jobs I’ve had since I turned 16, the different cycles of playlists my iPod has gone through since grade 8 – kpop, spanish music (because I did well in Spanish 9 and became a teacher’s assistant in grade 12), I had a sad playlist, a happy playlist, and now a driving playlist – and the many other decisions I’ve made based on what I desired most at that given time.
I think it’s beautiful that our desires exist to bring us joy. I don’t think anyone would desire anything if they didn’t see the joy it brings in someone’s life – when we desire for a particular career, when we choose a specific car, when we pray for a certain vocation, when we pick where to go out to eat or who to spend our time with – all these choices reflect our longing for joy.
It’s interesting to note that the last line of the first paragraph talks about the beauty of an unselfish heart. Perhaps that’s what it comes down to. Which of my desires is the most selfless choice? Which decision is life-giving? Will choosing this career path allow me to serve others better? Will making more money allow me to love not just my family, but beyond my family? Will this vocation allow me to love God and love others more than I can do on my own?
A sister of mine shared with me once that “on finding God’s will: figure out what requires more love, then do it.” Maybe that’s the discipline in our desires. Choosing what is good vs. the greater good. Exercising the virtue of Temperance, which leads to the virtue of Chastity, which then leads to Love. Which one of my desires (as good as they may all be), allow getting to know the Lord better? Because the only true joy is in God, and in adding value to someone else’s life.
Praise God.