Tag: Annunciation

So be it

How fitting that on the Solemnity of the Annunciation I am prompted to recall the yes’s I have given to the will of God, in particular with this new path of discernment. Unlike Mary, of course, my yes was not so easily uttered.

Too many times have I deliberately ignored the Gabriels in my life, opting for messages of comfort rather than challenge. However, all of the greatest calls of God require the greatest sacrifices. In fact, any call from God, big or small, will demand less of self and more of Christ. So when I had spent what felt like years wrestling with the message of the Lord to simply open wide the door of my heart once and for all to becoming a mission volunteer, I, like Mary, was “much perplexed” (Luke 1:29). Actually, I was more petrified than anything else. There was nothing more frightening than coming face-to-face with the will of God. There was nothing more dismantling than recognizing the nothingness of myself and the everythingness of God, and if that weren’t enough, having to then acknowledge that even in my nothingness He still yearned for me. Wow. How could it be that in all of my resistance He still pursued my heart? It was precisely in these moments of prayer that I experienced my own intimate annunciations.

It became clear to me that I simply needed to stop dismissing and start discerning. I needed to stop fighting the Spirit. I needed to submit – not with a heart of defeat but with a heart of trust. After all, no one was ever left dismayed after saying yes to Christ, not Noah nor Moses, not Peter nor Mary – every yes to Christ is a yes to life and life to the full, at that.

Of course there are still moments where I am overtaken by doubt towards God’s will and power in my life, but I am comforted in knowing that if God can make fertile the barren (Luke 1:36) and bring divine life to the Virgin (Luke 1:35), He can do anything for me and through me, so long as I cooperate.  This is the most difficult part of it all. Cooperating does not only require a free and faithful yes, but a yes that says “I accept any circumstance”, “I embrace every cross”, “I lay me down”.

My fiat to the mission volunteer program, among all the other changes in my life with graduation, job search, and relationships, is but an act of giving to the Lord what rightfully belongs to Him – myself. It is a sincere yes to give this path it’s due amount of discernment before shutting the door completely (as I’ve already prematurely tried to do, to no avail).

I am not convicted, at least at the present time, of any outcome of this yes besides emerging from the program a more faithful daughter of God, ready to do whatever He wants for me. With Mary as my model, I simply want to make myself His handmaid and bring Christ into the world. My yes for the Lord to use me for His glory is captured precisely in the words of Blessed John Henry Newman:

“God has created me to do Him some definitive service; He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission…He has not created me for naught.” 

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O Holy Spirit, spouse of Mary, discipline my heart to say “yes” without delay. Let my “yes” be given freely, without bitterness or resentment. Keep me from asking why but instead asking how. How, O Lord do you desire to use me today? How, O Lord can I please you today? I know that your requests for me will never be easy – it will be life changing and self-sacrificing, just as it was for the young Virgin. Whatever it may be, give me the heart to trust in the Father’s divine will and the feet to go with haste to do what I’ve been asked. O that I could bring Christ into this world as Mary did!

 

Let It Be Done

During adoration today at St. Bonaventure Church, I was meditating on the gospel for today and the Lord revealed to me, through the example of Mother Mary, a lesson on discernment and service.

Mary did not ask to be the Mother of God, God chose her. Same goes for service, we do not choose our anointing, God is the one who chooses and anoints us. The message came from the Angel Gabriel, and for us, the message comes from the Holy Spirit working through our leaders. Like Mary in the Gospel, we too are usually initially troubled with the annunciation of what the Lord has told us. However, the Lord always seeks to console us with His words “do not be afraid”, just as He consoled Mary. He knows how weak we are, that is why He is always quick to minister to our frailty, especially when our hearts our troubled. The Angel then explained to Mary what the Lord has planned for her. In our case in the community, we are asked to serve in one way or another.

Like Mother Mary, our humanity asks the question “how can this be?” Naturally, we think the task the Lord is giving is impossible. Of course it’s impossible if we only rely on human strength and understanding. However, with God, nothing is impossible if we rely and lean on Him. Leaning means to not stand on our own but to be held up and rely on the strength and power of God. The Holy Spirit truly comes upon us just as He did Mother Mary, and makes all things possible. When we allow the Holy Spirit to come upon and overshadow us, Jesus Christ truly dwells within, and the fruit of whatever we do in the Holy Spirit is Jesus Christ.

When we say “yes” to God, we are formed and become a little bit more like Jesus. When we say “yes”, we allow the power of the Holy Spirit take over our weaknesses. When we say “yes,” God’s will, will be done.

The experience of saying yes to God might be a very dramatic one and we might feel the presence of God very profoundly in that moment. That is a grace from God to strengthen our faith and resolve to do His will. However, do not forget that “the angel departed from her” (Luke 1:38) after all was said and done. After saying yes to the Lord, those sentimental feelings and emotions, that feeling of God speaking to us might depart as well. It is important to not rely on feelings and emotions when following through with God’s calling, but solely on Truth and Love. When it comes to Charity and Truth, it does not rely on feelings and emotions but on our commitment and our act of will.

Imagine, we discern whether to be a Program, Cluster, or Advocacy Head. Also, we discern things like whether to do a sharing or a talk, and we are given many days to do this. Mary had to discern whether or not she would be the Mother of God and she was given but a few moments to discern and ask questions. Mary was full of faith, her heart was in the right place, she asked the right questions and was obedient to the message of the Lord. In the end, she said “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” (Luke 1:31) No more questions. Just yes. She did not question if she was capable but simply found assurance in that God is able.

My brothers and sisters, when we discern let us ask the right questions—questions that will point us to God and not to ourselves. Let us listen with an open mind and heart to what God is trying to tell us. As much as discernment has to do with our lives, it has everything to do with God. We are not building our kingdom but His, so let’s always make it all about Him and His kingdom. We are merely instruments, handmaids, of His glorious plan.

We don’t only discern for big things but even the smaller things. Thus, whatever we are asked to do no matter how small or menial the task, let us always praise our God and do it with joy because we do it for love of Him. That is serving with a  servant’s heart.

Heavenly Father, we praise You. Please help us in our constant discernment to do Your Will. Purify our hearts so that we may see You, and help us not to linger on a decision you might have already affirmed us of. Help us to courageously answer Your call, no matter the call. May You be glorified and loved always. Amen.