True North Missionaries Journal

Dear papa God,

Happy fathers day. Thank you for everything. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. Thank you for making me your daughter. I am sorry for the times that I have hurt you. Im sorry for any pain or sadness I have caused you for not listening to your voice. I know despite this, you have never turned your back or abandoned me. Father, I am lucky that despite my brokeness you have never failed to embrace me with open arms.

I thank you for providing me with everything I need. For the Time, Talent and Treasures. For the people I am surrounded with, I am forever grateful. And this Fathers day, I would like to thank you for being the greatest father ever. I love you

One thing I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after:
to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to inquire in his temple.
[Psalm 27:4]

To be in the house of the Lord all the days of my life – not necessarily speaking about the physical Church, but to recognize the presence of the Lord in and around us at all times. It is the perpetual thought and pondering on Christ present in our hearts and the joy of knowing that we are forever in union with Him. It is a conscious and subconscious realization and reminder of this union during our day to day activities.

The word ‘delight’ comes to my mind. To find delight in the fact that He is always present. To find delight in knowing that His ways are not my ways. To find delight in believing that He loves us in a unique and beautiful way.

“When we save certain things just for ourselves, we spoil them. Save knowledge, not use it to train others it becomes pride.”- Venerable Fulton Sheen

 
When I heard this I thought of John Acosta. Few years ago, he came to visit Calgary and gave a talk at the Alcantara’s. He mentioned in his talk about spiritual obesity. It makes sense, how can we let others experience Christ if we are keeping the spiritual nourishment we receive to ourselves? Us, as part of this community, we are called to share Christ to others.

 

Our spiritual growth can potentially empower others by sharing our own story, our faith journey, the knowledge we get from retreats, teaching nights and others. In this community, we walk together and support each other. Let’s use our potential power to bring friends and families closer to Him. Let’s save knowledge not only for ourselves but also to help others.

“Be angry but do not sin. Do not let the sun set on your anger.”

Whether you call it the kingdom of God, paradise, heaven, whatever you call it, the most name it could possibly have is “home”.

The seemed to be the idea that God has me stumbling over lately. It is mainly because of an idea I heard through a homily this week. The idea was derived from the statement that the kingdom of God is revealed through the small things.

I thought more about the small things in my life. How I never do the laundry at my house, or how I will never have to worry about food because there is always something to eat. The small things that I can safely find at home. It’s quite remarkable how my home is a glimpse of what heaven is like. I can see now why the CFC community is so driven to build the church of the home, because if our homes are heaven on earth, then it is a brilliant movement to grow it.

I can also see why my mom is always so concerned with maintaining the house in such an orderly manner. Our home, our family, it is heaven to her. She put everything into turning a mere building of brick and wood, into a place where I can feel safe, secure, loved; she made it into a place where I belong.

It breaks my heart knowing that I take her effort for granted. That all of the small things she does is not something I used to consider as an action of love. I realize this today: that pride has allowed me to turn a blind eye to the kingdom of God, allowing me to think that I deserve better than the grace God has given me.

Have you ever made a decision, and then gone back and forth countless times about it afterwards , wondering if you’ve made the right one?

Do I do what is easy or what is right?

It’s often easy, or maybe not easy but easier, to follow certain commandments as opposed to others. Sometimes it’s the smaller ways of obedience that we ought to pay attention to. The Gospel today is a reminder of the need to ponder on the commandments, not just when they’re preached to us, but in everyday life. If there is something that I can do today that can be more pleasing to God than what I was doing yesterday, then I pray that I can have the courage to do it.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference

 

Something I find difficult to deal with sometimes (I’m sure everyone can relate to) is not just being able to face reality, but to live in it. 

What do you mean by that?

Well, allow to share real quick.

I had a very personal conversation that lead me to be very vulnerable and allowed my heart to be seen from a mile away. God knew my desire, He’s heard the same prayers for years, and yeah, it just didn’t happen the way my heart was desiring. 

At first it wasn’t too bad, because I was taught and had previously reflected that God will always have the better plan. That our suffering does not go unseen but in fact is planned so we may be filled with greater graces. I told myself everything was going to be okay, that I can face reality and carry this new cross in my life. 

Truth is, it was easy to say, easy to convince my mind that I could face the new reality but it turned out very quickly, that I couldn’t convince my heart that I could live with this new cross. 

Ever felt that way before?

If you have, or still having trouble living with the reality or position that God has placed you in, maybe this small compilation of reflections could help you as it is helping me.

First off, Praise God. Where we are tested, where we suffer, is where God plans to fully allow us to realize we simply need to cling to Him for hope, faith, love. 

This new cross you are carrying isn’t just 2 pieces of wood. This cross carries the victory of the Lord in our lives that we are giving up what we want, for what He needs. The crosses we carry in our lives are reminders of the eternal victory ahead. Be proud of the cross you carry…because it carries the love of the Lord and the reminder that we trust Him 100 percent despite our own suffering.

When you look at the cross, you see a glimpse of true love. What better way to bear that cross in your life then to look at it with love.  

Defend your prayer time. 

So yeah, easier said than done. I found that out real quick in the last few weeks. Stay positive, keep praying. Keep choosing Christ because when we choose Him, we choose true love. 

Pray for me as I journey from the beginning.

Long live Christ the King