True North Missionaries Journal

My God,

How are we doing? Am I actually following the steps you set out for me to follow Your will? How am I doing? I’m sure you’ve seen the little things I’ve done to show You I love You and to thank You.  I’m sorry I slipped a few times this week. Please take away anything that confuses me, whatever makes me doubt of what we can accomplish together and elements of my everday life that might lead my focus away from You. I leave these distractions, these matters that pinch my heart at the foot of Your cross.

With and in Your grace, love, mercy and light, I will do better tomorrow and the coming days until the end of my days. I will fall more times than I would prefer but don’t let me give up until I’m perfected in You.

Forever grateful,

Alodia

 

“Spend as much time as possible in front of the Blessed Sacrament and He will fill you with His strength and His power.”- Saint Teresa

It’s been a while since my last visit in Adoration Chapel. If I’m not mistaken its already more than two weeks, its because I got so busy this past few weeks, school exams, vacation, work and some other activity. And I feel so bad because I get so comfortable within those weeks that I didn’t visit him and talk to Him alone in adoration. I usually visit adoration once a week or as much as I can,we talked about my day, if I’m happy, my stress, my problems, usually everything but the saying is true if were so happy or so pre-occupied with lots of things we forgot to talk to him.

When I enter the adoration chapel the feeling is so light, it feels like I’m home. I realized that I have so many story already for Him, yes for sure He knows everything what happen to me but still talking to Him like were siting together and having our personal conversation makes me realized that I should do it frequently like before no matter how busy my schedule. If no one can understand you, for sure He will, with all my question in life and sometimes complaint, He listen to me and never get annoyed with all of it. Its my intimate time with him,but I forgot to do because of prioritizing other stuff. Its a small white host sitting on the the table in front of us but its Jesus Christ who loves us unconditionally and always waiting for us to visit Him and talk to Him. For me I missed Him,I miss being with him and I miss talking to Him.Saint Teresa of Calcutta once quoted,

“To be alone with Jesus in adoration and intimate union with Him is the Greatest Gift of Love-the tender love of Our Father in Heaven.”  

 Heavenly Father, give me the strength and courage to spend more time visiting and talking to you. I want to be more intimate with you, because I know you love me and I want to give back this greatest love.Help me to always moved my feet towards your home and sit with you, because I desire to be with forever and ever.Amen

 

Praying,

Mark

 

 

Hi, my name is Ysabel Agaton and I’m currently an MV applicant for the GTA Area. We’re currently being tasked with posting up a reflection once a week and this will be my first official one, in a long while so please bear with me. I think to start these series of reflections I want to share with everyone my conversion story. I first got this idea from our Area core shout, Ate Ellish (our Full-Time Pastoral Worker) had asked us to write down what we consider to be our moment of conversion or our own ‘conversion stories’. She told us that these stories are the ways Christ has touched our lives but most importantly she reminded us that when people read our stories it will be a way for them to see how Christ has loved us.

When I was younger, I was very much your typical scene kid. Angry at the world, angry at my parents, angry at myself. If it ever affected my life in some way I was angry at it. Religion has always been a big part of my life since my parents had raised me Catholic. Going to Mass every Sunday, praying before every meal, and praying before going to bed had all been routine to me. I was honestly fine with the religion that was passed down to me. I didn’t take any particular interest and put more effort than necessary into Catholicism. This all changed when my older sister, someone who I looked up to, started being very vocal about questioning her faith, at the moment she was going through a lot personally and she was sometimes lashing it out on our parents and on us. Her questions led to my own questions. Questions, that I think were still too big for my brain to fathom back then and since I couldn’t understand it fully, it just made me angry. I started to hold these doubts and these questions very tightly to myself. I felt like if I asked them out loud everything I was raised on, and everything I thought I believed would come crashing down. At the same time, I was battling with what I now know as my anxiety/depression, and struggling with my own sexuality. This goes on through grade 7 and all the way to 1st-year university. I went in and out of relationships, I started vices and fell into addictions that I’m still struggling with today. All those things just added to the cloud of doubt that was surrounding my heart. I gave and I changed so much of myself away that even till now I’m still trying to find what I lost. In other words, I was a mess. I had created these knots inside me with my doubts, my anger, my resentments and it seemed impossible to untangle it.

There wasn’t a moment that I felt instantaneously changed. But, in all my doubts and in all the challenges that I was facing I can honestly say that the Lord has never once stopped calling me by name and asking me to come to Him. He has this way of taking me from where I am and literally moving me to a different country just so He can speak to me directly. That is where my own conversion story starts. When I was 18 I got the chance to go to World Youth Day in Spain and it really changed my faith. It was then that I got to chance to travel to three different countries and to be able to see and witness the love of God everywhere and in everyone. He took me on a journey just to show me how much His love can fill not just one person but a whole country of people, by surrounding me with people who live out His will every day. On this trip, I was blessed to be able to go to Fatima, to Lourdes and to Spain where we got the chance to visit many important places to certain saints and to our own faith. During those moments, I didn’t get to appreciate what I was able to experience and what I was able to see in those holy places. But, the Lord never gave up on me and He still won’t give up on me. He was showing me, future me, that a life lived in His love and glory is a life fulfilling its potential. When He showed me those places, when He whispered to me the stories of those saints. He was showing just how grand and beautiful His love can be if only I let Him in my life but most importantly my heart. He was promising me a life filled with love, passion, and beauty if only I chose to live in Him.

I guess you can say that my conversion story is ‘grand’ but that’s just how the Lord talked to me at that moment in time. Everyone’s conversion story is different. Some are instant, some are long standing, other can be momentous and other can be slight. What matters is in that moment, that is when God has spoken to you. He has chosen to speak to you in a way that is meant for just you and only you. I’ve learned to cherish those moments in my heart, even if at the time I haven’t quite yet understood what He was trying to tell me. God truly has a plan for us, and it’s in our own stories that it can be revealed to the world.

Prayer: Thank you, Lord, for creating me and calling me to loved by You.

Ysabel

Yesterday, I caught up with a very good friend from Winnipeg (holla!). We were updating each other on our weekend happenings. Mine was uneventful. I was telling her that my only goal for the day is to drink water. I needed to drink lots of water because it was a hot day, specifically 31 degrees Celsius. The heat was giving me a headache. Then she mentioned that she read a book wherein every chapter is a day’s goal for the protagonist. So let’s say it’s Day 23, the main character’s goal is to do household chores and so on.

When I think about it, these simple daily goals help centre the day and make one feel accomplished even in the little things. Really, we should and we can worship and glorify the Lord in the details of our day. He is there at the minute moments and familiar routines as much as He is there during our big breaks, major life events. He is always in the present. When we start to worry about the future and when we regret the past, our trust in God has already faltered because we are not living in the moment. The past, present and future are His. Trusting Him means leaving them at the foot of the cross where they truly belong and going on our day – enjoying every breath, every moment where his love, joy, grace and mercy are expressed in our everyday encounters, common challenges and embodied by everyone around us: people we love, people we don’t like as much but we are working on it, people we just met, strangers who say good morning.

Only God knows what lies ahead and why the past played out the way it did. Even in the unknown, He is always around. It is also in our everyday thoughts and actions that we can shape and change ourselves for the better. We can train to be more enduring or loving or patient or all of the above. Our thoughts (goals) will ultimately shape our character. Let’s take it one day at a time. So let’s love and appreciate the ordinary. Set simple goals for ourselves and let the Lord direct those too,  as much as we seek Him on our grander aspirations. We’re ordinary people with an extraordinary God.

We’re just ordinary people
We don’t know which way to go
‘Cause we’re ordinary people

Trying,

Alodia

Friendliness, warm reception, kindness, generosity. Those are a few words to describe my short but very fruitful stay in Seychelles.

I have been on mission here for the past two months. Originally, I was to go to Mauritius, the area assigned to me after training, but had to wait until my work permit was granted. So somehow, the Lord brought me to Seychelles and I have been living here for a little over two months now.

In Seychelles, where tourism blooms, you can find beauty practically everywhere within the 115 islands. Hotels, resorts,  guest houses. They spend a lot of resources to maximize the quality of their hospitality. The people are (very) friendly and generous, especially towards guests and visitors.

You can imagine how it’s been for me whenever I encounter locals and most specially, CFC. I honour all of the CFC leaders in Seychelles for the incredible reception of not only me but of any family or person in need. I cannot express how grateful I am for their unconditional love, showed through the many deeds and simple presence throughout the duration of my stay.

I have been reflecting on my experience in the last two months and  the dominant word that keeps coming to mind is hospitality. To be hospitable, there is a giving up of self. A humble yet powerful disposition. Hospitality requires being sensitive to the needs of others above yourself, listening to someone’s difficulties and sharing in someone’s joy.

This is exactly what the Lord has allowed me to experience, through the warmth and love of the Seychellois. Being on mission, I have learned (and unlearned) so many things: about myself, about loving others and most importantly on how God loves me. I have learned, early on, that mission is beyond what you can offer. The Lord will always bless you with the grace you need to do his will.

Tomorrow morning, I will be leaving this beautiful country and going on another unknown yet exciting journey (Mauritius). I am both excited and nervous as I pack my bags, this time, bringing many more learnings and experiences along with me. I am always praying for the grace to be a good missionary, to be able to love and care for those God has placed for me.

My heart is so full and ready to be emptied again so it can be shared with others. Please pray for me as I embark on a new journey and a new opportunity to love.

Lord, as I continue this journey with you, may I always be reminded of my loved ones in Seychelles. May I love as generously and as selflessly as they loved me. May I radiate You, Loving Father, to the people I get to encounter. Most importantly, may I always welcome people with warmth, generosity and open arms. Amen.

It’s not a good bye, just a ‘see you later Seychelles’

Marie-Joyce

 

“The secret of changes is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on BUILDING the NEW.”-Socrates

I went for a holiday last week,and while on vacation we had our monthly meeting as MVA and teaching about our discernment “One Desire”.

Where I am right now on my discernment?How do I pray and pursue my relationship with my God?

Sometimes in my life I still have lots of question about my spiritual journey,I have fears, yes as human I have fears what will happen in the future, is it going to be okay, or is this the decision the Lord wants for me. Sometimes I get weak too in my faith, I feel spiritual dryness too, but I fight it with prayer and seeking him more. During Evony’s talk she said that “He calls us to come to him, not to run away from Him, if I need to crawl going to Him then crawl. I have the tendency to run but because I am New now I would rather crawl, slowly but I’m sure its the way to be closer to Him. One of my friend said during the time when I hit the rock bottom of my life.” Mark you are already here, you cannot go back to the Old you.This is your new journey and He will not bring you to this point if your just going to the Old you.” Yes its true everything happens because its his plan,this is me now discerning for what the Lords wants for me and answering what calling I have. For wherever direction I will go, for sure He will lead me because I already allow him to handle the wheel of my life. So where I am right now, I’m still on my way ,trying , doing my best to be more closer to him, to listen to Him, trusting and surrendering everything. Because I know I can’t do anything without Him.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”Philippians 4:13 

This is a new me, one of  the Mission Volunteer Applicant, praying,discerning and surrendering to my Creator and Saviour.Serving to the community and to my fellow brothers and sister.He brings me here so I will embrace all his plans for me because i don’t have plan to travel going back to the old me.

“Yet not what I want,but what you want.”Matthew 26:39

 

Let Jesus lead the way, and let Him be more in your life.

Surrendering,

Mark