I never really knew the importance of fasting until it required fasting something I needed. To me, as ridiculous as it sounds, that “need” was coffee.

The first week went by, and all I could think about was coffee. I would get a ringing headache, then later become blinded in a sense that my sight would become so blurry that it made me incapable to drive properly. And despite of wanting to give in to maybe just one cup of coffee a day instead, I felt a stirring, saying:

“Hang on. Just hang on to me…”

I was shocked because it honestly wasn’t the first thing I thought of doing. Instead, I was so distracted by the pain and craving and the agony of the moment that I was completely hung up on finding remedies to the game.

The first week was challenging. I cried sometimes because of the pain, but I still heard the voice… “HANG ON. HANG ON TO ME…”

The second week came, and it was no longer agonizing, but it hurt.

The third week came, and I hardly was thinking about it. And by the end of the week, I found myself happily relaxing by the couch, completely comfortable, sipping on a glass of… water.

NOURISHED.

CONTENT.

HAPPY.

AT PEACE.

NO PAIN, WHATSOEVER.

That’s probably the moment I realized it is not a game or a competition of how long I will last, but rather of how long He lasts in me. It wasn’t until I realized I was even drinking a glass of water that I realized the most fruitful thing about fasting is that it is life-changing; it renews us in a lasting happiness; it re-instills Christ and His patient love.

Without discipline of the heart, the mind, body and soul starves. With discipline of the heart, the mind, body and soul is always nourished.

Like coffee (as simple as it seems), I feel it is those small simple things that easily pass by in our lives without prayer. There will be and already are worldly things we feel we need. For me, it was coffee. But as worldly as it is, sometimes, it will really only be the false, temporal, and worldly pleasures of this world that will point us towards realizing why the void exists; it is really calling us to what, or rather, Who we really need. When it became too hard – even with something so seemingly simple – I hung on… I hung on to Him in prayer.

My Lord, Jesus Christ, I need You, and I always will. Holy Spirit, come and nourish my life. This, I pray, in His Most Holy Name…

Amen.

TOTUS TUUS.