Author: MJ Ramos

It all started with me being pursued. He wooed me at the very first encounter. He was so mysterious and I liked it! He was sending me constant signals that he wanted a relationship with me. Sometimes they were clear, other times the over-thinker in me clouded the signals and I was left confused.

Time was his greatest gift to me. He gave me his time when I was sick, when I was feeling down or sad, and he was always someone I can confide in. He was definitely there when I had my happiest and proudest moments. During the in-betweens, he was still sticking around! When family time, work, school and service got me busy, he was just there waiting for me. He challenged me in so many ways, but made sure I felt loved throughout the entire time.

I started to sometimes take him for granted, I wouldn’t talk to him because I became busy and it was just a hassle to stop and spend time with him. I started choosing others over him, even though I knew I was his priority. Then it got to a point when I would talk to him when I needed something. I found myself always asking him to help me. I would even get disappointed when he didn’t give me what I asked him, when he didn’t allow me to do the things I wanted to.

I would then start feeling bad for the way I treated him. He was so good to me, why can’t I appreciate him? I suddenly felt unworthy of his love. He loves me and always finds a way to show it. I on the other hand was too preoccupied with my own desires, or at least what I thought were my desires. I began to miss him, a lot! I looked for him everywhereThere was a void in my heart that only he would fill. But he was still always there.

Whether I realized it or not, he was pursuing me after all of these years. His mercy is endless and his love for me is overflowing. I am at a point in my life where I desire to pursue him. In spending time with him, in getting to know him, in wanting to be with him. Although it is still a challenge, I know that choosing to love him and serving him everyday is all worth it. I know that I am meant to be with him and to bring his light to others.

My heart longs to be with you, Lord. I will seek you and find you with all of my heart. May you never get tired of loving me and pursuing me. 

Amen.

Lately, things have been hectic with my schedule with work, preparations for camp, households, CLP and everything in between. With just so little days left before the camp, my uncle asked me to drive with him and the family to Toronto for the weekend. I hesitated but agreed to go. I knew that by leaving I wouldn’t be able to attend events scheduled for the weekend, final preparations for camp and CLP. However, I knew that my family needed me and that things would still run during my absence.

We are here in Toronto to bring my grandmother back, after staying with us in Montreal for a few weeks. Despite all the things I might have missed back home, I wouldn’t of missed this opportunity to be with my family. It seems like the Lord wanted me to pause from everything and enjoy my time with them. I missed the laughs, the stories and the simplicity of sharing a meal together. We are also remembering our Lolo’s death anniversary and we were able to celebrate Mass together at St. Michael’s Cathedral. This is a blessing in itself because we rarely go to mass as a family (Thank you, Lord & thank you, Lolo!)

As I sit at the edge of the couch, while my uncles and aunts yell at the TV during the Pacquiao fight, I can’t help but thank the Lord for this great blessing. I’m grateful for this short trip and for the memories I will hold dearly in my heart. I’m thankful for the love I receive from the ones I care about the most and for the moments I get to feel God’s love. God must really love me because He knows what I need and when I need it the most. In this discernment for missionary work, I cherish every single moment I can spend with my family, especially knowing that I may one day be away from them. For now, I will cherish this weekend as if it were a picture that I can hang on my wall.

Heavenly Father, thank you for loving me through my family here on earth. May you always remind me that I must also love and serve them in the best way that I can. May you continue to bless us and protect us from harm.

Holy Family, pray for us.

AMDG

As you may already know, one of my crazy dreams is to change the world. Sounds cliché but I can say that I’m extremely blessed to be placed in an environment that allows me to do so on a daily basis. I work at a non-profit daycare centre that’s heavily involved in providing services to help disadvantaged families by ensuring quality child care. The daycare is only one of the many services that is provided for the family, being a small (but just as important) party of a huge network with endless resources for parents. I was recently given the opportunity to join a team that runs special projects to increase the quality of services for children, families and staff. This is one of the small ways that I can slowly “change the world”, by helping and serving the families that need it the most!

My passion for working with children is what’s been driving me closer and closer to God. Whether it be in my studies, in my career, or in my service, He always brought me where the children were. Knowing, loving and serving children means knowing, loving and serving their families. It means that families play an integral part of the development and well-being of the child.

Serving in Couples for Christ for the past 10 years made me understand how important that is. Whether or not the Lord wants me to be a full time pastoral worker, or a full time early childhood educator, I know that one thing is for sure — I will love and serve Him through the children and the family.

Embarking on this new and exciting (but also challenging) journey, I was very nervous and hesitant. What about my discernment in the mission volunteer program? Many what-ifs were being thrown around in my mind but I couldn’t help but ask myself “what if this IS part of my discernment?” The Lord has great plans for me, I just need to discover them! At this point, I can only surrender myself to Him. Wherever the Lord wants me to be, I will go! Lord, lead the way!

Heavenly Father, thank you for all that you have given me so far. Thank you for the challenges, the  trials and fear, for they allowed  opportunities of growth, mercy and patience. Thank you for stretching my heart and helping me understand and discover the plans you have set for me. Lord, please use me to do your will here on earth, may I do it joyfully and with complete obedience. Help me O Loving Mother, to imitate your obedient and pure heart. 

Thy will be done.

My favourite season is fall! I enjoy the colder weather (yes for layering!), the warm coffee, the blanket scarves, the boots, the colour, the change.

Today at work, I brought my class to play in the backyard. We like to call it the forest because we are blessed to have many trees there.  The children and I stopped to examine this particular tree because it was aesthetically pleasing and also because we noticed that it was already red, yellow and orange, while the other trees were still green and slowly changing to yellow.

Reflecting on this simple experience, it made me admire the season of change. Autumn is a season of change. It’s a time to prepare and collect our harvest so that we can endure the long and harsh winter months. It is a time to prepare ourselves for what’s ahead but to also enjoy the changes we are currently experiencing.

I attended daily mass last week and receiving the Eucharist every day really helped me to change. I mean, every time we receive Him through this Sacrament we are never supposed to be the same but sometimes we take it for granted and we don’t realize that we walk out of mass changed. We are walking Tabernacles and we are called to be and bring Him wherever we are. If Christ is within us, then we cannot help but change. We can’t help but be transformed by his love and his grace.

In this season of change, I realized that my prayers are no longer the same, that my intentions are constantly changing and the number people I am praying for is always increasing. I realize that my heart is changing because of the every day blessings and the every day reminders of how much He loves me. I’m realizing (…more like accepting) that Jesus really brings me joy and love (lots of it!)  and that I do want to change because I want to prepare my heart for Him and his will.

I’m enjoying this season of change and I’m looking forward to how much I’ll love tomorrow!

Heavenly Father, thank you for the abundance of blessings and love you continually give me. Thank You for allowing me to receive your Son in a very intimate way. I pray,  Lord, that you humble my heart so that I can experience the fullness of your love as I go on with the changes in my life. Grant me the grace to endure it and most specially to enjoy it.  Amen. 

AMDG

October 1st, 2016.

Today is the feast day one of my favourite saints, Saint Therese of Lisieux. She’s a very popular modern-day saint and I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who admires her.

Let me begin by tell you that for the longest time, I never asked for the intercession of saints. I did not have any interests in getting to know them, probably because I didn’t understand them or I had a huge misconception of them. I thought they were not relatable and that I could never attain their “level of holiness”. Two years ago, I asked the Lord to reveal himself to me in ways that I haven’t seen or experienced yet. That’s when I took discerning for my vocation seriously (oh shucks). I went to the gift shop at Saint Joseph’s Oratory and stumbled upon a little book about the life of Saint Therese of Lisieux. With no interest of buying it, I skimmed through the pages and on one of them was her very short biography and I read that she died at 24 due to tuberculosis. “She wasn’t martyred? She died because she was sick?!”, I asked myself. I continued reading and learned that her prayer life seemed very dry to her at times, and that she would even fall asleep praying the rosary. “Whaaaat? Is she even a saint?”. I decided to get the book because she seemed “too normal” to me.

Too normal. Too relatable. Too personal.

Who is she? Why did she catch my attention? I discovered more about her until she became my friend. The more I got to know her, the more I was able to ask her to intercede for me. I like her because of her devotion to the Lord but also her realness in her suffering in despair. She made me realize that, even someone who was declared a doctor of the church, struggled, and despite that she persisted until the very end.

When I reflect on my life and my journey as a mission volunteer, I think I put this pressure on me and strive to do things the right way (because I feel like I need to be a good example to my brothers and sisters). I look up to the full time pastoral workers because they are so wise and willing to serve the Lord, but I tend to forget that we all have our weaknesses and struggles. But at the end of the day, it’s really okay! The Lord looks at our hearts and our intentions of loving Him.

Saint Therese reminds me that I don’t need to do grand things in order to show the Lord how much I love him (although theres nothing wrong with that either!). I can “do small things with great love”! We all can…and I think that this is a great challenge as missionaries. We are called to bring the Gospel to everyone – everyone meaning people we might not really enjoy (hehe) but are called to love nonetheless, and to accept that it’s normal to suffer and struggle in the name of the Lord.

You see, saints are normal people just like me and you. Sinners who kept on trying. It took me a long time to realize that and now I can truly say that I am getting to know many saints who help me experience the greatness of God. Who is your favourite saint? 

Dear Saint Therese, pray for me that I, like you, may have great and innocent confidence in the loving promises of our God. Pray that I may live my life in union with God’s plan for me, and one day see the Face of God whom you loved so deeply.
Saint Therese, you were faithful to God even unto the moment of your death. Pray for me that I may be faithful to our loving God. May my life bring peace and love to the world through faithful endurance in love for God our savior.

Loving God, St. Therese never doubted that her life had meaning. Help me to see how I can bless and love everyone in my life. Amen.

Saint Therese, pray for us.

AMDG

Last Saturday, Kids for Christ participated in their 7th Global Day of Service. We collected used clothes and home items and gathered them in several bags. We walked from our venue (Our Lady of Fatima Parish) to our local non-profit organization, called Renaissance. There, our used goods are re-used, re-invested in the community and they also provide work to help sustain individuals and their families.

My biggest blessing is seeing the youth so involved in making sure that the kids understand why we are doing this and what will happen to the items they donated. It’s always amazing for me to see young people being and bringing Christ to little kids. If there’s anything you need to know about me, it’s that I love kids! I have a huge passion for helping young children discover the world and to be able to bring them closer to Jesus is a dream come true.

Our world is filled with beautiful things and people but nowadays, we see the ugly and the evil happening around us. I believe that children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they possess inside (shout out to Ms. Houston). A little cliche, I know, but I really believe that our younger brothers and sisters have the power to change the world we will live in tomorrow.

However, I wished that more brothers and sisters throughout all the ministries can realize that they can also be part of this beautiful opportunity to shed Christ’s light to others. But this inspired me to be hopeful for the future. The joy the kids spread whenever I encounter them can only lead me to share it to others. Global day of service does not have to be a once a year event. It should be be everyday. We should acknowledge the greatness of Our God and be willing to share it to others every day of our lives.

Lord God, I thank you for the abundance of resources made available to me. I lift up to you all the kids and their families, that that may be empowered by the Holy Spirit to be world changers. That you continue to transform their hearts into the servants you want them to be. I pray that you can grace me with more humility in giving my time, talents and treasures to my brothers and sisters who need it. Help me to love you more by loving the people you love. I pray for those who might not know you yet, that you may use me to spread your Light to them. Amen.

AMDG

(August 24, 2016).

My recent reflections has been about experiencing the Lord’s mercy time and time again.

If there is something I learned in my journey as mission volunteer, it’s that the Lord will always take care of me. He took care of me before I entered the program, for the last couple of months, and He will certainly continue to take care of me. I will never be able to understand how much He loves me but I’m grateful and feel extremely blessed.

Despite all of my sins and all of my shortcomings, I continue to feel the Lord’s love and mercy in every aspect of my life.

All He asks of us is to trust in Him and to turn to Him always. No matter what, the Lord will love me and will make me feel his love.

Jesus, I trust you. I love you.

AMDG