“Seeking the face of God in everything, everyone, everywhere, all the time, and seeing His hand in every happening”
– Mother Teresa
Lord, amid this storm I’m under, remind me to still love and stay firm. Help me to understand and see the purpose behind Your plan. I desire the strength and energy to never get tired of serving You and may you help me see that. My worries mean nothing as long as You are with me. I trust in You!
As I was going through my Facebook feed today, all I noticed were photos of my friends graduation photos. I couldn’t help but feel a little blue and think “that could’ve been me” and suddenly all this doubt went through my mind thinking of how different my life would have turned out if ever I ended up graduating in my program, Early Childhood Education this April – man, was I excited to start applying for Teachers College right after..
But that’s the thing, we can always imagine and try to predict what will happen tomorrow, or the next few days, weeks, months from now.. there will always be that change that comes unexpectedly. As I went through that 1 minute of slight emotional fallback, I failed to realize how much He has blessed me aside from allowing me to graduate on time.
This one year semi-hiatus from school made me value my (career) vocation even more. I’ve had my times of set backs, and I doubted my own abilities, but one thing the Lord continued to tell me is that, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.” (Psalm 32:8). I focused so much of my time with my family and service – especially in Kids for Christ, it truly affirmed me that this was something I wanted to continue doing. To teach.
It’s a long road ahead but it’s something I’m ready to start climbing, running and trekking for. At the end of it all, I’m SO happy for my friends and colleagues I’ve met within the past three years who are graduating. I know with their vast knowledge and experience, they will do great things that will inspire and aspire those around them… Especially the children of tomorrow.
Lord as for me, I am looking forward to this next step in my life, and I look forward in doing what I like to do the most, help children and families’ needs. Whether it be in the educational field or through mission. The Lord is funny and mysterious that way! I can only wait and see where He places me.
On Friday I finished my last exam of this semester! Well technically of this school year. Bittersweet feeling I must say.. Because after stressing so much the past four months about my part time courses, I now have time off school until the end of April.
What first came into mind was, “Man, this really sucks. If I hadn’t of screwed up last year I would have been able to graduate this coming April 2015.” Another thought was, “Now what am I going to do now until my internship in May?!” …All this negativity just circling my brain.
Because I was unable to do my internship in May-August 2014, I wasnt able to continue on to fourth year – thus setting my graduation date a year late. It was emotionally draining me because I knew I wasn’t going to graduate with some of my friends I’ve met and adored from first year. I didn’t exactly know how to break it to my parents that I couldn’t continue with school because I didn’t want them to worry about the financials. And lastly, I didn’t want people thinking “low” of me because I wasn’t graduating on time…
Then I realized, because of this “huge” mishap, I was able to experience great things this summer and come end of this year. Here are a few,
I’m continuing to accept change because it is inevitabe. The Lord is constantly working and molding us that trying to deny these changes will only slow down what He has planned for us. So maybe this “mishap” was a blessing from above after all. Of all the things that were happening within the community this year and everything beyond that, I was able to experience BECAUSE of this mishap blessing. Because I continued to open my heart and trust Him, only made this change that much easier to accept. This step back from school was only a step forward with my relationship with Christ because He made me see all the beauty (such as all the mountains and enormous sushi from Vancouver, TNC and serving backstage, endless prep for Kids Village, road trips with my family, etc) He had in store for me the past couple of months.
So now until April, I’m excited for what lies ahead. Whether it be my service in CFC-Y, KFC or my family and the church. I must remind myself to stop questioning and start accepting.
God bless!
The topic of mission is a very touchy and personal subject. Although we see and hear the word almost everywhere in our community, it’s still a very intriguing subject.
How often we hear the word mission ready and no matter how many times we say we are mission ready, are we re ally wholeheartedly, mind, heart and soul readily available? Personally, the amount of YES’s I’ve said and done, there is always that hesitation that follows along.
I take into consideration the “things I bring” with me when I say yes. And the things I leave behind when I say yes. Even if I do not want to. For example; my family. One very topic heavy subject that I will always bring with me, in my thoughts and in my heart when I think about mission. But physically is the hardest thing to do. If or when the Lord calls me to greater mission, the sacrifice of leaving my family behind almost scares me – to the core. But I have yet to know the reason why it’s so difficult for me to accept that.
The fear of my loved ones not being taken care of is almost a slap to our Father’s face. I doubted Him and continue to doubt Him whenever my heart feels uneased..
I was watching a (Filipino) show and they sang this song,
Huwag kang matakot
‘Di mo ba alam nandito lang ako
Sa iyong tabi
‘Di kita pababayaan kailan man
At kung ikaw ay mahulog sa bangin
Ay sasaluhin kita
Do not be afraid | Didn’t you know that I’m right by your side | I will never forsake you | And if you ever fall off (a cliff) | I will catch you
This particular episode, the family was going through a rough time. Not only do they emphasize on “kapit bisig” (to show solidarity as a whole) together as a family, they make it known that the Lord will always take care and provide for them.
But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. – Philippians 4:19
The Lord chose me before I chose Him. He knew how everything was going to play out before I even had the time to start discerning about it. He will take care of me, and my family. Because He loves me. Our God loved us first and He wouldn’t bring us to where we are without taking care of the people we love most.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7
Lord, I trust in You.
The Lord really does work in such mysterious ways. He also works on His own pace, on His own time to make sure every crack and crevice of His plans are perfect. What He does ask of us in the process is to remain patient and trust that in no time, but His timing, things will work out according to plan.
The past couple months have been very difficult and lately I’ve been feeling very spiritually dry. My prayers started feeling different and attending mass slowly had no affect on me. I became very impatient because I felt that nothing was going right anymore. I tried to avoid everything and I found myself just keeping to myself because I no longer wanted to deal with it.
One day, I received two messages from two sisters, the first message was:
“My child, trust in me. Don’t be afraid to ask Me for the light that I want to pour into your heart and soul. Not only for yourself but for all those I have placed along your path with whom I want you to share the light’s brilliance to. Remember that no matter how dark all might seem around you, My light dwells within you and I am calling you to share it through love and by loving those around you.”
Second message was:
“Sending you a hug, God is still here in your life, even when it’s the middle of the storm.”
The Lord’s timing could not be anymore perfect. I was so blind sighted by the negativity surrounding me, it affected me spiritually, emotionally and physically. Instead of turning to Him, I have the tendency to get sucked into the darkness, not knowing the Lord is simply holding my hand waiting for me to walk back with Him.
I have such a disconnected relationship with the concept of trust and patience. I solely seek the Lord and continue to ask for these two things. Slowly, I started to realize that He’s given me the gifts of piety and understanding. Piety, to slowly but surely devote my whole being (trust, humility and love) to the Lord and to always remain prayerful. To understand that no matter what, the Lord will always account for everything He has and will hand us.
Ad maiorem Dei gloriam.
No matter the situation you’re in, how great or small the struggle may be. The Lord wouldn’t place you in it if He didn’t intend you to overcome it.
There are certain circumstances where emotions may take over your mood and the thought of giving up sounds like the safest way out. But we need to remind ourselves that the Lord is greater than our struggles. In order to believe that we will get through it, we must also believe in Him that He will take care of us.
It hasn’t been easy to fully surrender my all to Christ, but lately it has become so easy to do especially when He constantly reminds me that the struggles I’m currently going through is nothing compared to what His plans are for me. I feel uneasy trusting others with my struggles, but we need to remember that He isn’t like everyone else, He is our Father and He will take care of us. You have given me the courage and the strength to truly believe that these obstacles can and will be tackled.
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. – 1 Peter 5:10
Lord, I surrender it all to You. Whatever your plans may be for myself and my family, I entrust that you will physically and emotionally take care of us. Remind me that Your love is strong and that You are capable. And You are able. Lord, I Trust in You. Amen.
My greatest blessing would have to be the presence of my family. Whether it be a short amount of time to days on end. I cherish the time I spend with them only because we rarely have the time to really be together and have quality time. Not everyone can experience the closeness of ones relationship with their family, which is why I really hold them close to my heart, despite the hardship we go through, the Lord has taught me to be grateful.
Lately it has been difficult to really focus on one thing at a time. For example, when I’m with family, on the back of my mind I think about service. Especially during this time because of KFC Kids Village. As much as I love to be with my loved ones, I can’t help but think of all the tasks that needs to be done. Which ultimately takes away my “quality time” with them. Or when I’m preparing for something, I’m also thinking of another task I need to complete. It’s a vicious cycle my mind seems to go through. Needless to say my mind is in constant action, barely giving it a break.
Friday night during our Area Core Household, we had the privilege of having Kuya Noli, SFC Fulltime Worker give us a small exhortation. He introduced “Coffee Time with God” and what exactly that coffee time meant. As he went deeper into the topic, I realized that I haven’t been giving myself the time to really sit down and have that quality time with Christ, outside my prayer time, outside service and outside my family.
I have been blessed with an abundance of service the past couple of months and I know the Lord will continue to shower me with blessings. Needless to say my cup has been so overflown, He has quenched the thirst I have been yearning with such grace through this community. But I never really had the time to just really thank Him, sit down with Him, share and listen to Him.
Despite the busyness of our schedule, we must remind ourselves that our coffee time with God is just as important. Having this moment with Christ allows us to open our hearts to Him, just like we would with a friend we’re having a one-on-one with. The Lord doesn’t ask for much but to interact and communicate with Him. Like a sister was saying, we need to be honest with Him, we can’t ultimately assume He knows what’s wrong just because He’s God. Just like us, He yearns for interaction, intimacy and quality time with us. He wants to speak with us and listen to us as much as we want to with Him.
“Take a moment and relax with God. We must find rest and comfort in the Lord, because ‘it is no longer I, but Christ who lives in me'”. – Galatians 2:20