It’s been almost five months. Five months of being “out of service”, having passed on my role, that feeling of being spiritually dry, and at some point felt isolated in the faith. I did my due diligence of prayer, mass, confession, adoration and such, but despite those things, something still felt missing.
And I think that something was worship. I thought to myself, that worship was my most powerful prayer (still is). It was something I embraced for the longest time serving in this ministry, and for some reason I felt that I had a hole inside my heart when I lost it.
During that time, I felt that God purposely made me isolated from everyone. That he intentionally wanted me to be alone, to be idle, to be silent, so that there wouldn’t be any distraction but Him alone.
“In the silence of the heart, You speak”
Truly I felt that he spoke to me, He wanted me to obedient, tested my patience and faith, and dried me out, so that He can fill me up again.
I applied for the Mission Volunteer program as my response to being obedient. To be honest, I didn’t exactly know what I wanted out of it, what my expectations are, what fruits am I gaining out of it. But then I realized, It was always His plans, His expectations, and His fruits that he wanted to share with me.
Months came by and I was getting anxious and weary, waiting for that moment where I get to find out if I did make the program, and the area of which I am to serve. But I kept my faith through it all, I lifted my fears, my worries, and my impatience to Him. Because I know that He will never disappoint.
In the same time, I also decided to go to this year’s ICON in Palawan. It was a bit of an accident actually. It started as a conversation I had with some YFC people, to booking off the dates, to them being approved, and the next thing you know, I already have a ticket! All in the span of four days! That affirmed me that for whatever reason, I was meant to be part of this year’s pilgrimage.
The day finally came! Where we were en route to flying to the Philippines. I’ve never been so excited again to relive the memories I had of last year’s conference. And even more excited as I get to journey with the new brothers and sisters I serve with.
Coming into ICON I was given the opportunity to be part of the Documentation Team! That felt surreal! I’ve always wanted to serve for the conference in the past, even in small ways, and now that I have the chance to do so, I made sure I went all out!
Within the pre ICON activities, that’s when they brought the good news! I finally found out my mission area! Praise God! Another answered prayer! It was a mixture of different kinds of happiness! I felt at peace, felt loved by the Lord, and felt affirmed of my obedience.
As days go by, my excitement builds up as I first step foot on the ICON venue, and saw the stage for the first time. Saw the crowd, with lights everywhere, the people going back and forth filling up the stadium slowly, briefly looking at Mama Mary and the Crucifix in awe. And in the midst of everything, I knew one thing for sure, that I was ready to worship and empty myself again.
The Lord is Good to Me
I was overwhelmed by the Love that he gave me. That He was with me through it all, from the time that I was broken and hidden, to the time where I was whole and revealed again to give him Glory!
“And my soul will find refuge
In the shadow of Your wings
I will love You forever
And forever I’ll sing”
And with that, I cannot wait to share with you all, the moments I was able to capture.
Happy Easter everyone!
God Bless
