In overseeing the preparations for the bakery, choosing the countertops has been the most agonizing thing (haha). From choosing THE ‘MOST PERFECT’ DESIGN,
to measuring out the exact length that is needed,
to ordering the exact size and having to decide with pre-made ones,
to having to measure the required pieces of the pre-made piece,
and then sawing it out and chiseling away the rough edges…

We are much like these countertops. Imperfect in design and size yet for some reason, the Maker – Our Father – chooses to bear patience in His design in us. Over the years, He has been measuring me out of what has previously shaped me in my ignorance and arrogance of Him. He has been sawing away those imperfections and chiseling away the rough edges. He has been removing all that is unnecessary, and keeping only what is needed in His perfect will, in works with my free will to submit to this design.

The thing is, like building up a bakery, it’s easy to carry hope in the vision of what it will become, but the process of getting there can be very tiresome and painful. The chiseling away and sawing off of all that is unnecessary can be very painful, hurtful, frustrating, sometimes in immeasurable lengths. But that is what has brought upon the beauty of God’s design through the cross.

The chiseling away may take time and a lot of patience, humility, trust, and perseverance, BUT through Love, the finished piece is always the most liberating and beautiful thing – NOT BECAUSE OF THE DESIGN – but because of the journey.

What I have come to see through the years is that despite of what we become, there is a design that God so excitedly awaits to chisel away in us. And even after our submission, it isn’t easy. When the process is ‘done’, it might not be the most perfect thing to someone else, but

Perfection lives within the Maker.

It is not so much about the design, but about Who the Artist was behind it all. Like most other artists (i.e. Michaelangelo, Picasso, Monet, Van Gogh, Warhol, etc), most people won’t necessarily know every exact art piece that was created by them – only a namely few ever could. But what is remembered is that the artist has brought extra ordinary amount of beauty to life, and the artist is forever known.

May God be forever known through His design in us, in our acceptance of His will, our perseverance in good faith, and in hope of True Beauty despite the pains of the chiseling and sawing away, Amen.

In You, I trust.
Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us.

TOTUS TUUS.

It hasn’t even been 3 days, and I remember it so clearly.
I came across two Catholic women having a discussion about charismatic communities…

"I'm not for it. It's too much. Where do they even lead us, throwing 'knowledge' about gifts here and there, and 'speaking in tongues'. What are they even saying?"

"Yes! And 'healing'... the only healing that truly fulfills is through the sacrament of Confession. I understand some people might need emotional help and are experiencing a lot of brokenness that they just might need the company, but it's pointless without the Sacrament of Reconciliation."

Being a part of a charismatic community, myself, I felt a stir to say something. But I prayed for patience to not speak with aggression, but with love and truth. I jumped in and said,

"You know, there are a lot of things we can say, but at the end of it all, God reminds us that we determine the true gifts of the Holy Spirit by its fruits. I agree, sometimes, it isn't always directed in the 'right' way, or brought up to its fullest potential, but the importance of community is that we are surrounded by people who could help guide those gifts to their full potential, in works with the Church."

They nodded, then said, “That’s true…” and stopped talking.

I don’t necessarily know if it’s because they agree, but their minutes of silence and nodding, and sudden change of topic encouraged me to believe that it left them with something to think about. To be honest, charismatic communities really won’t be for EVERYBODY. One thing I learned from the encounter, however, is this:

Sometimes, although we want to stand for the Truth. It isn’t always what we end up doing. As St. Paul says in Romans 7: 14-15, “We know that the law is spiritual; but I am carnal, sold under sin. I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” But the Voice of Truth is what triggers the change. 

Time and time again, I have thought it was something someone would say, or something I would say to someone. But having experienced what I did, I’ve come to also realize that the Voice of Truth can also be an action, or even a thought or the way of approach. It is how we allow God to use His Spirit in us in every thought, word, and action.

The voice of Truth is how we allow God to transform our passions and emotions into a gift to those around us.

When we can do this (through an increase of knowledge AND experience), then like those who encountered the disciples, they will see the Truth and be encouraged to do the same for others, whether it be through a charismatic community, acts of kindness, or in whatever way they may be personally called to love. At the end of the day, the voice of Truth, after all, IS God, and God alone. And the fruits? Quite simply, it is nothing less than ‘the good stuff’. Haha.

May God be praised!
TOTUS TUUS.

I was surprised with a comment recently, while watching a movie about St. Francis and St. Clare of Assisi. After the scene where  “I wish God would speak like that to us today. Why can’t we hear God’s voice or call like that so clearly these days?” And it led me to think…

Maybe it isn’t so much of God not speaking to us that way anymore.

Maybe we have just simply become too loud.

Back in the day…

No one had cellphones. No one had wristwatches to constantly check the time. No one had iPads, iPhones, or mp3’s and earphones to drown the world out in decibels of music. And the only tablets that populated conversations were the ones God had written on.

If we would travel alone, we could reflect for hours, hearing only the sounds of God’s creation…
In a day’s journey, we spoke to one another – for weeks of a journey sometimes.
In a day’s journey, there weren’t any vehicles that would prevent us from feeling the wind or the true heat of the sun, or a radio to blast explicit words of “artists”…

The only Artist many of us would hear was God. And He didn’t swear, but speak words of Truth and Love.

But now-a-days, we have distracted ourselves with noise we have created; distractions we can choose to ignore or put aside. And unknowingly, we drown out “The Voice” that many of us have become envious (of our ancestors) of not hearing.

Maybe it isn’t so much that God isn’t calling us or speaking to us, but rather we have grown to hear our own voice more, or the voices of this earthly world. But if we take one car ride to turn off the music and/or turn down the window… or take a walk somewhere quiet to just drown ourselves out of the noise we have created, maybe… just maybe… we will hear “The Voice.”
TOTUS TUUS. 

I have been so blessed to be humbled by the places God has brought me to in this mission. And one of the most meaningful have actually been my home parish.

Every year, my family always participates in a pilgrimage to Teopoli – a retreat area where communities gather for the stations of the cross. 2 years ago, I had been blessed to do this in the Philippines. Just a few months ago, I had been blessed to meditate upon the stations of the cross in the places they happened in Jerusalem. And this year, due to a specific turn of events, I remained here in small-town Milton, ON.

I was so surprised to pull into the parking lot… it was more full than Christmas. But it was humbling to see that no matter how many parishioners overflowed the church, everyone kept reverence. It’s as if every single person in attendance (even the children) somehow knew what was going on, and my heart laid at peace.

Many people dream of the Holy Land. But what I believe and have witnessed to is that the Holy Land can be anywhere. It is wherever we bring Christ. And this Easter, I sat in peace seeing a piece of such a beautiful experience right where I am; HOME.

As we made our way to New Brunswick, I began reading one of my books, while a co-missionary was playing Lighthouse CD’s through a laptop, somehow connected to an amp, plugged into a converter in the back of the van (mission ready van!!!), as another co-missionary shared some of her family’s greatest dreams fulfilled through graces given in their service to the Lord.

I sat, basking in a banquet of faith and knowledge, and was reminded of a few simple things…

DON’T BE AFRAID TO TRY SOMETHING NEW.

I have often heard that “ignorance of knowledge is ignorance of faith.” I haven’t always been the best at reading books, or research. Sometimes, when it isn’t the kind of book or topic I like, it takes me forever to complete. A seemingly good read would begin to slowly make its way to the back of the shelf, remaining forgotten for years, only to be opened ___ years later to find a random bookmark beyond pages I had forgotten.

I have recently began to appreciate the creative library of knowledge God has placed into this world. One that is archived in the hearts of others, in the passing seconds of each breath every day, in the pages of paper – glossed, newly published, and in some old treasures, and in the seconds of a disc or pixels on a screen. Knowledge, wherever it roots itself is a gift from God and a newer revelation of His existence in mankind and in all creation. So I have taken up completing everything I start, no matter how difficult.

In every completed page, my faith grows in knowledge, and falls away from ignorance, allowing me to defend Love with love and confidence in the Lord, and the “mustard seed” continues to take its root and grow.

It doesn’t necessarily always matter how long it takes to complete the task. What matters is that whatever God has given us is constantly fulfilling the purpose He had given us in each moment of our lives, no matter how slow or fast. And in this fulfillment, there is contentment. In joy and in sorrow, there is contentment.

“But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may accomplish my course and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God.” (Acts 20: 24)

Where has this motivation bloomed from? Scripture. One of the greatest doctors (St. Jerome) of the Catholic Church once said…

“Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ.”

And from the treasures in Scripture, a seed of curiosity – of wanting to know more – began. Now, no matter how difficult it is sometimes, I have learned to joyfully persevere. In saying so, the task becomes more joyful because beyond the difficulty, I am coming to know Christ more and more.

TOTUS TUUS.

I never really knew the importance of fasting until it required fasting something I needed. To me, as ridiculous as it sounds, that “need” was coffee.

The first week went by, and all I could think about was coffee. I would get a ringing headache, then later become blinded in a sense that my sight would become so blurry that it made me incapable to drive properly. And despite of wanting to give in to maybe just one cup of coffee a day instead, I felt a stirring, saying:

“Hang on. Just hang on to me…”

I was shocked because it honestly wasn’t the first thing I thought of doing. Instead, I was so distracted by the pain and craving and the agony of the moment that I was completely hung up on finding remedies to the game.

The first week was challenging. I cried sometimes because of the pain, but I still heard the voice… “HANG ON. HANG ON TO ME…”

The second week came, and it was no longer agonizing, but it hurt.

The third week came, and I hardly was thinking about it. And by the end of the week, I found myself happily relaxing by the couch, completely comfortable, sipping on a glass of… water.

NOURISHED.

CONTENT.

HAPPY.

AT PEACE.

NO PAIN, WHATSOEVER.

That’s probably the moment I realized it is not a game or a competition of how long I will last, but rather of how long He lasts in me. It wasn’t until I realized I was even drinking a glass of water that I realized the most fruitful thing about fasting is that it is life-changing; it renews us in a lasting happiness; it re-instills Christ and His patient love.

Without discipline of the heart, the mind, body and soul starves. With discipline of the heart, the mind, body and soul is always nourished.

Like coffee (as simple as it seems), I feel it is those small simple things that easily pass by in our lives without prayer. There will be and already are worldly things we feel we need. For me, it was coffee. But as worldly as it is, sometimes, it will really only be the false, temporal, and worldly pleasures of this world that will point us towards realizing why the void exists; it is really calling us to what, or rather, Who we really need. When it became too hard – even with something so seemingly simple – I hung on… I hung on to Him in prayer.

My Lord, Jesus Christ, I need You, and I always will. Holy Spirit, come and nourish my life. This, I pray, in His Most Holy Name…

Amen.

TOTUS TUUS.

Have you ever taken the time to sit by a windowsill to look outside and just stare at everything surrounding you? Or ever found true peace, just sitting by the shore or by the edge of a highland to stare out into the sunset? Have you ever been in the presence of snow and looked at the intricately unique and perfectly symmetrical design of every snowflake?

We are drawn to simplicity. Even the busiest of the busy people yearn for the time to be able to just relax and enjoy the simplicity of life and nature. Things like being able to stare out into the sky to admire its beauty without having to be on standby for the next meeting or conference call.  SIMPLICITY is something we all desire. But very few of us admit to it. Very few acknowledge it. These things are simple things, but we always find them in the midst of complexity (i.e. within busy schedules, busy streets, business environments, cities, mere kilometres away from busy neighbourhoods, etc).

If I could take this simplicity towards a different perspective, I think I would draw it towards people. Often times, we are quick to seek the complexities in others. The imperfect things. The negative things. And sometimes, it is enough to make us stop looking. But if we take the time to admit and act on this sometimes- buried-desire for simplicity, we might be able to find ourselves looking at something more simple, and more beautiful. We will begin to see at least one beautiful thing about them, and if we focus on that, the healing from our own judgment may begin.

Love is not just about being faithful and hopeful, but also about being merciful.

And if we can look at things in a more simple light… in a childlike faith and in simple joys, we might begin to further understand… We might find ourselves being able to forgive more easily, and stand more in awe of His Presence and leading in others. Lest we not forget, Jesus also called and loved the ordinary. But it was a simple desire in them and how they acted in mercy, faith, hope, and love of God that made them EXTRA ordinary.

“It’s the simple things in life that are the most extraordinary.” 

Lord, may we continue to learn and grow in Your extraordinary love. Amen.

Jesus, King of Divine Mercy, I trust in You.
TOTUS TUUS.