Author: Ellen Maigue-Talacca

Lately I’ve come to know a cute nickname for the Lord (aside from the usual “Saviour”, “Redeemer”, etc, haa).  More than ever do I believe He is a “God of Surprises”. Just today:

• “Surprise! You’re going to Montreal!”
• “Surprise! We’re doing this training… a completely different way.”
• “Surprise! You’re giving # sessions, yeah?”
• “Surprise! [says He through a sister] Hey, you free? I’m in Mississauga, can we talk…”

Yes, there are so many Surprises in Mission life itself…but how surprising is the initial call to Mission? Is it as off putting as the usual Surprises? Do we wake one day with the sudden conviction (you’re packing your bags for the Philippines at this point), that hey…”I AM called!”? I mean, for missionaries like Paul, the God of surprises made it so obvious. The Call was so surprising that he was literally knocked off his donkey.

The saying goes…“He calls us out of Love”. If I am loved every day, than as a Missionary, I am Called everyday. Deeply loved, deeply called.  The Call only becomes a Surprise when I start forgetting I am loved.  I firmly believe that surprises in Mission are just the creative ways He can love us, heal us and transform us. Saying “Yes” to Mission is a response to the simple realization that He has been doing this…all along.

Fall in Love
(Fr. Pedro Arrupe)

Nothing is more practical than
finding God, than
falling in Love
in a quite absolute, final way.
What you are in love with,
what seizes your imagination, will affect everything.
It will decide
what will get you out of bed in the morning,
what you do with your evenings,
how you spend your weekends,
what you read, whom you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.
Fall in Love, stay in love,
and it will decide everything.

A professor shared this prayer to us a while back in one my theology classes, and it has never ceased to remind of what it means to live a purpose-driven life.  Most days I wake up not knowing what lies in store for me (still waiting to read a set of Job Description for Full-Time Work), and the illusion on certain mornings even is that there is “nothing to do”.

This is never really the situation though.

I am not simply a Worker fulfilling a list of responsibilities, but a servant responding to the Mission the loving Father asks of me, each and every single day.  On those lazy days, I must ask then, where are you calling me today, Lord? And when He replies, I answer.  Knowing fully well Who is asking, my Beloved, what is left to do but wanting to give my best to Him, from the very minute I wake up in the morning, until I lay to rest at night?

Fall in love. Stay in love. And it will decide everything. 

It’s been four days since the #ETNC, a week littered with post-Conference fellowships.   The frenzy came slowly to a close with my last houseguest leaving for Montreal (*ahem Ellish *ahem). While doing “less than exciting” housework and clean-up, the Jesus Experiences stuck out like a sore thumb in my mind and heart.  No doubt, Conferences always bring about:

• Renewed Convictions: “Yes! God told me THIS…[insert inspiration received in powerful worship, or other ‘God-inspired’ experience].”
• Personal Miracles and Transformations: “God CHANGED me…He…[insert change experienced, whether Big or Small].

I recently asked a sister MV:  How do you think you’ll know you’re called to Mission? Our discussion led to a short discussion on Desire. Reflecting on this today (in the middle of caring for the house plants, the maternal instincts kicking in), I realized that it’s about His Desire to love us through [insert calling].

“You will find your conviction by sitting so close to Him, heart-to-heart (eye ball-to-eye ball).  Enamoured and ablaze, He then whispers to you “Come, follow me.” And out of love, we obey and follow whatever direction He leads us to.” 

I believe the call to Mission, or His personal Mission for us, is this: a response of love to the love He desires to shower us with. These moments can happen through the extravagance of “Jesus-Expo-esque” events, or simply in the sum of small realizations, that He desires to love through…[insert personal, “God-given”, Calling].

definition: Gusto with vigorous enjoyment (syn: ZEST), individual taste 

I often get jokingly made fun of for my “raw enthusiasm”. Expressing too much raw excitement, or too much, “all-out”, Joy.  I really don’t mind.  I truly believe that Joy opens us up to experience Miracles in the seemingly mundane things, repels emo thoughts, re-energizes, and re-affirms how creative our God is.  He is one for loving Surprises!

I recently came home from an un-scheduled, and sporadic visit to Montreal over long weekend. A baby shower/honouring session, three real talks with my mother and/or sister, and a buffet dinner with the family later, I am amazed about how the Lord is, and has continued working His own mission in my immediate and extended family  The challenges are different and very real, but so are their demeanours, which have visibly become are more joyful and hopeful. An tangible affirmation of the reality that, If you take care of the things He cares for, He will take care of the things you care for. 

Back into the busyness of my Mission Area, I am affirmed today by the notion that as I get busy, He is too. In fact, the Lord has already been up way earlier in the morning, so early that that specific hour doesn’t exist, (haa #Godabovetime), weaving, with eagerness, His own mysterious plans in my life. He’s got it in the palm of His hands. With that in mind, Lord, that I may do my mission today with the same gusto! 

One random day, just met someone new:

Random person: “So what is it that you do?”

Me: “I’m a full-time pastoral worker for CFC-Youth. I’m…[with God-fearing conviction] a MISSIONARY.”

Random person: “Missionary? Oh wow, that’s awesome. So what kind of things do you do? Are you on leave?”

Me: [confused] “On leave?”

Random person: “Yeah, don’t you go to Africa, or something?”

Me: [recoiling] “Ohhhh, no I don’t.  [prays, internally refocuses]. It’s kind of the modern day kind. I work with youth in different parishes…”

This was a dialogue I got a couple of times in trying to explain Full-Time Pastoral/Mission work to someone. In this day and age, nothing is an easy explanation, especially with anything related to being a Missionary, usually taking a couple more sentences aside from “I do mission work.”.

This becomes really evident when it comes to explaining Mission to loved ones.  I find that in those situations, not only am I faced with explaining the ambiguous nature of Mission, but having to tackle all the questions that will reassure them…that I am not jeopardizing my life plan. About three years ago:

Me: “Mom, I think I want to do Full-Time work.”

Mom: “What is this Full-Time work?”

Me: [discerning] “Like what Arnold did? Kinda like working for YFC, full time. [In “hyping up” voice].  You get to…[insert sharing of the day: anything from “plan Conferences”, “changing people’s lives”, “fly on planes”, etc.].

A year later:

Mom: “Ah…you get to travel, eh? Ok, do that.  I did also when I was younger.  Go for it. I also know this makes you happy.” 

Sharing and explaining Mission may be unpredictable and uncomfortable, but choosing to weather all of it, the posture taken, describes perfectly what a Missionary does: to Witness to Him, no matter what.  God, in turn, never leaves us hanging.  In every situation, I’ve found that He inspires, in a timely manner:

• Some sort of DESIRE to witness: to something that is ultimately GOOD, despite this good being totally, incomprehensible.  Which makes sense…the Call (and the One who calls) is beyond ourselves.
• COURAGE to do so: despite the sum of all fears and doubts, we find ourselves talking about Mission to that person/group anyway.

Witnessing is an active LEADING of the Spirit: not always the same words, not always the same emphasis. A demonstration of the Holy Spirit‘s flexibility and the Father‘s creativity. Whether in clear words, or simply through our posture, God emboldens us to proclaim and become the needed the Word the world needs. Being a Missionary is not so much about explaining What we do, but Whom we want to make known.

 Lord, as Missionaries, give us listening ears to hear the words that will proclaim You. Bring about in us the desire to witness to You, and embolden us to be You living word. Amen. 

“Awkward Llamas”. “SFT”. “Intrepidus”. The search (and jokes) for a name for the most recent MV batch continues. One name, however, seems to stick out like a sore thumb to me:  the “Fearless Batch”.

In getting to journey in the lives of the East MV at SHOUT last week, and after a reality check on my own calling, I realized…. there are indeed many reasons to fear the call to Mission.  So many. It is true when they say that mission is beyond ourselves. His Calling is out this world. It really does make us tremble in holy fear.

It’s this fear, however, that draws us closer to God’s embrace.  For 5 days, we worshiped together, lived together,sharpened each other,  RAKed Oakville, Ontario together. Prayed for the Mission. In the midst of all this, we celebrated 2 convocations, and supported a brother through a loss.  I couldn’t help but inwardly exclaim, “this is what a Missionary Family is”. Never alone. Never without purpose. Always One in God’s presence and promises.  Called to proclaim and bring out the joy and love that overflows from hearts surrendered to Him.  There may be much to fear, but always much more cause to celebrate: the Sender of our Mission is the most loving Father of all.

Every time I have a one-on-ones, I always marvel at how intricate and how amazingly the Lord weaves His stories in individuals, how He really marks lives surrendered to Him.  Sometimes even, it’s difficult to contain the Excitement, “Lord how great are Your works”!

And then there are those times when the Lord reveals the more challenging stories, the ones that trigger your Inner Worries, and you find yourself saying, “Lord, how Your great work is still needed!”, followed by #panic…because not only are you sharing in a story, but you are called to be part of the writing process.  # accountable. These moments remind me His work is beyond ourselves, only God is the master writer.

“But Mary treasured all these words, and pondered them in her heart.” -Luke 2:19

 Treasure and ponder. No matter how intense the emotion, I always picture Mama Mary outwardly stewing, but inwardly praying, totally unmoved. Her trust was unwavering. Lord, please grant me the same posture!