Author: Anton Brosas

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” – Matthew 6:21

I was reminded that when we discern, it is important to really reflect on what our passions and desires are. More often than not, these are God-given and lead us to holiness. Sometimes these desires pass because we did not do our part to help it grow or because they were earthly, but other times they just never go away. These ones are the ones that point us to God, His love for us, and how we were created to respond to it.

I opened up to a brother about my discernment for FTPW and after sharing with me his thoughts, he told me that each of us are created with a unique thorn that pierces our hearts. This is not something to run away from, but to seek. This is where we can find where our treasure, where we can find our hearts, and where we can find the Lord. It makes a lot of sense because this piercing was designed to unite our suffering with the Christ and give us the conviction to never give up, just like Him.

The thing that pierces my heart are father wounds. These are wounds that have been inflicted by earthly fathers. I have been blessed by the Lord to witness people with those wounds and I can’t help but feel compassion for them. My heart aches. I feel that my God-given mission is to be the best father i can possibly be. To father my children as God fathers me. To love my children and God loves me. And I will never stop doing that.

Tying this into my discernment for FTPW, it affirms me of my belief in this community and its anointing. CFC is about building the Church of the home. I want to be part of that mission for the rest of my life.

 

 

 

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after thee
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship thee

You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship thee

You’re my friend and you are my brother
Even though you are a king
I love you more than any other
So much more than anything

I want you more than gold or silver,
only you can satisfy.
You alone are the real joygiver
and the apple of my eye.

I love you, Lord

“Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” – Proverbs 27:17

God has blessed me with really great households. I have been surrounded by God-fearing brothers who only want to do the work of the Lord. And that posture is contagious.

When I first became active in the community, I had baggage that discouraged me from loving others and serving them. In the midst of the discouragement, there was one particular brother who took the time to have a one on one with me. He wasn’t my household head or in my household. He was just someone in the community. That’s when it started.

I felt loved despite my imperfections. I felt loved despite my mistakes. I felt loved for who I was. And it was that same love that propelled me to serve. To this day, I believe that was God’s love. A love that has no fear, or restriction, or judgement. A love that heals. A love that makes all things new.

I try my best to practice this posture now. To meet others where they are, understand them, and show compassion. Can you imagine how St. Peter would feel if Jesus discouraged him because of his denial? Instead, the Lord forgives, encourages and strengthens us. We are called to do the same.

This compassionate love can be best shared in our households. Households are a source of genuine friendships and are filled with God’s love. If we feel loved in our household, it’s easier for us to love our own household (1 John 4:19 – We love because He first loved us).

I’m thankful that I have been able to maintain a majority of the genuine friendships made in previous households. The brotherhood that is shared in a household is unforgettable and is what makes the community a community.

I’m eager to continue to grow with my brothers and to discover the Lord through how we love each other.

 

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,
Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being loved…
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I …
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should…

In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen

I learned that the Lord never reveals Himself to someone without giving them a mission. He revealed Himself to Abraham and told him to leave his country (among many other things). The Lord revealed Himself to Moses in a burning bush and told him to go back to free the Israelites. He revealed Himself to Isaiah to begin his duties as a prophet. The Lord revealed Himself to Mary to bear the Son of God. He reveals with a purpose. He commissions.

My last reflections have really lead me to this one. If God is always with us, revealing Himself to us, then He is, without a doubt, asking us to do something. Scratch that. He’s not asking us. He’s telling us. And if He’s telling us to do something, what’s really stopping us?

Pride? Envy? Anger? Sloth? Greed? Gluttony? Lust? All of the above. And as much as pride is the root of it all, I learned that pride derives from fear. A fear that God is someone who is dangerous, who limits our freedom. A fear that makes us think that His ways interfere with our ways. This fear stops us in our tracks, makes us hesitate, makes us doubt. These deadly sins are a mountain, one built on top of another.

Thank God for the Sacraments. Thank God for the heavenly virtues. Thank God for humility, kindness, patience, diligence, charity, temperance, chastity. Thank God for multiple chances. Thank God for not giving up on us. Choosing to to accept God’s grace and to grow in virtue will help us hear and carry out what the Lord commissions us to do.

There is no need to fear Love.

 

“Journeying is an art,” the Pope replied, “because if we’re always in a hurry, we get tired and don’t arrive at our journey’s goal. If we stop, if we don’t go forward then we miss the goal. Journeying is precisely the art of looking toward the horizon, thinking where I want to go but also enduring the fatigue of the journey, which is sometimes difficult.” – Pope Francis

Pope Francis nailed it on the head. Fr. Dave said in a homily, “we are not human doings. We are human beings”. I used to think that being busy was a sign of productivity, growth, and success. But it means nothing if we do not take the time out to just be with the Lord.

I used to think that in times of suffering, hardship and trial, that the Lord is really preparing something great for me. And it’s true. But now I know that the Lord is IN the suffering, IN the hardship and IN the trial. The Lord isn’t just waiting for us on the other side of the man-made or God-allowing challenge. He’s with us in the journey. Emmanuel. God with us. He comes to us. He meets us where we are. He runs towards us, embraces us and carries us. The Lord is also IN the victory and IN the blessing, He doesn’t just give us things. He gives us Himself. He is not just the reward at the end of the journey. He is also in the journey.

At the end of the day, there’s really no reason to be unhappy. The Lord is always with us. The Lord was, is and is to come. He knows that we’re going to get tired and forget what lies ahead in our journey. So He comes to us where we are. He knows that we’re not going to acknowledge Him being with us at this very moment. So He gives us hope. And when we forget what lies ahead and can’t seem to acknowledge Him in the present, He reminds us of what He’s done for us in the past.

Now that’s something.

 

 

 

The Lord really knows how to love us. He knows what our heart really desires. He knows what makes us tick. He knows how to challenge us. He knows what’s best for us. He knows what we need, when we need it.

I’ve been asked by the Lord to do a few things that I never thought I would or could do. I said YES without any hesitation for some, but at some point or another, have questioned whether or not it was the right decision. But every time I question my YES, the Lord affirms me that I made the right choice.

When I said YES to MV, I actually just decided to stop saying no to FTPW. Never really felt a tug to be a missionary but I figured there’s no harm in discerning about it. I was right. There is no harm in discerning about it. But through my discernment, the Lord showed me reasons to say YES.

Every YES we give is an opportunity for us to experience God’s love in our life. It’s not a coincidence that we feel more loved by God when we give ourselves to Him in our YES. Sometimes it’s not easy to see. Sometimes we don’t see it til days, months, or years after. But believe me, the Lord knows how to love us. And it’s not a coincidence that we are exactly where we are right now. Thank God we are experiencing consolation. Thank God that we are experiencing desolation. The Lord wants us to experience Him. The Lord wants us where we are right now so He can love us.

Lord, help me accept things as they are. Everything that comes from You is good and is for my own good. I may not understand it now, but I know that You love me. Help me to recognize your love for me in my life.