I recently watched The Greatest Showman (an amazing movie that I think everyone should go see) which was a movie about P.T Barnum a young man who had great dreams of entertaining people and bringing joy to their lives. He came from a poor family but through his passion and dedication to his craft would eventually go on to become the creator of the modern day circus.
One of the stronger themes of the movie was P.T.’s desire to dream bigger, but it was also his downfall as his ability to dream eventually caused him to lose sight of what was most important in his life. This has also been the running theme in my own life, especially these past few weeks. As I step into the new year as a Mission Volunteer, YCOM Area Head, and a student in school, I have a lot of planning, and preparation ahead of me, a lot of dreams in sight. However, in these first few weeks of the new year, I have been in a state of Acedia, something my spiritual director likes to define as “just coasting”. I have many great desires and dreams, but when it comes down to it, I haven’t able to move forward or take action. I realize that the source of this was my lackluster spiritual life, as with the responsibilities piling up I had found little time to be still and pray.
Prayer is the gear that drives us, it’s is our connection to God. When we try to take on the world without first making time for the Lord we will always fall short. Often times I will tell myself that I didn’t have time to pray, but the reality is rather that prayer wasn’t a priority. When we enjoy something we make time for it, rearrange our schedules and our lives so that we can be a part of it, but when it comes to prayer we often find excuses. This weekend at our Regional Leader’s Retreat we were blessed to have perpetual adoration, and during my time with the Lord in reflection, I was reminded of the joy and peace that comes with prayer, and the beauty of making it a priority.
With scheduled shifts for prayer and adoration, I rekindled the love and joy of prayer. Although waking up(or staying awake) until three in the morning for my adoration shifts wasn’t easy, it was a reminder that prayer needs to come first, and my relationship with God needs to be a priority. In order to be better like Christ, I need to spend time in prayer with Him. I pray that I may continue to journey with the Lord, to work with Him in prayer, and deepen my relationship with Him, so that I can make these dreams a reality.
Keegan