I am a hoarder.
I have an extremely bad habit of collecting things that I know I don’t need, but still keep anyways for that one day when I magically decide to use them. I’ve recognized more recently that this is a problem I should address so, the other day I decided that I would spend some time doing some *late* spring cleaning.
With a large garbage bag in one hand and some music playing in the background, I started to sort through the craziness that is my closest; cleaning out all the clothes and things that I should have gotten rid of a long time ago. As I began to clean, I realized then and there just how much stuff I had. I knew that I collected some things over the years but did not recognize just how much stuff I actually kept with me.
Whenever I found something that I forgot I had or when I pulled out old clothes that I haven’t worn in years, I felt a sense of embarrassment. I thought to myself: When did this happen? How could I have let this happen? Why do I keep things that I no longer use? And did I really allow my hoarding problem to get this bad, to the point where I was making such an unnecessary mess in my room?! I was always aware that I needed to clean but oh boy, I did not realize the amount of damage I was making all this time!
Alternatively, as I was sorting through my stuff I started to think about the “cleanliness” of my mind and heart. I began reflecting on my life and wondered if there was any cleaning that I should be doing there as well — Was there anything in my life right now that I should get rid of? Have I kept certain thoughts locked up in my mind that serve no good purpose for me? And are there any negative emotions that I bottled inside that only creates more mess than doing good? To be honest, finding the answers to these questions was not that hard at all.
As a person who hoards things, I have certainly kept many negative thoughts and emotions locked up too. Such as feelings of anger, frustration, hate, and yes, even grudges. All these things do nothing good rather, they do the opposite – bearing no fruit in my life and has even separated me further from God.
“ The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against such things.” – Galatians 5:22-23
If emotions like these keep me away from my Master, then why do I hold on to them anyway? Similarly, if I no longer fit into an old pair of jeans, should I continue to keep them so they can collect dust or should I let go and donate the pair so someone else can find a better use out of them?
I know that in this moment God was trying to speak to me. Reminding me that the more I hoard these feelings in my heart and in mind, the more mess I will create in my life.
I think that it’s important for us to do some “spring cleaning” for our emotional well-being once in while. We must learn to take the time to reflect on all the things that no longer bring light or joy in my lives and to find the courage to part from them. God is always calling us to bear fruit in our lives, to cultivate more love, peace and harmony over hate and evil. It’s just a matter of us actually following His footsteps and being willing enough to let go.
Therefore, let us pray to God for the wisdom to know when to stop “hoarding,” for the strength to let these negative emotions go and for the courage to trust that God will carry us through these tough and troubling times.
Amen.
Danielle