“Journeying with Christ is a beautiful adventure.”
This weekend I was able to take a walk down memory lane. Now being a person with short term memory, it can often times be quite difficult to do this. However, God spared me the headache and helped me to remember just what I needed at the perfect time.
On the first day of conference during Session One – In Faithfulness – the song “At the Beginning” from the musical Anastasia played. Not only is this song so beautiful, but there were specific lyrics that spoke so closely to my heart. I’d like to think that these lyrics were what sparked this trip down “memory lane” and how I think God was speaking to me at that moment so I could reflect back on my journey with Him.
“No one told me, I was going to find you. Unexpected what You did to my heart. When I lost hope, You were there to remind me. This is the start.”
10 years ago, I was invited to my first CFC-Youth camp by my brother. I’ve shared this many times before but I was only invited to a camp because a discount was being given out to all service team if they brought a participant to come for the weekend. Thus, through my brother’s constant pleading and my parent’s nudging me to go, I ended up at an unknown venue in Cambridge, ON where strangers were trying to talk me into falling in love with God.
As a 12 year old who joined the community I honestly did not understand what was happening. I thought that what I was doing as a Catholic was enough. I attended mass every Sunday with my family, received straight A’s in religion class and was a “good” girl. Despite all of this, as I look back on my behaviour and posture now there was so much more I could have done. I mean, I was definitely NOT invested in my faith nor was I eager to have any close relationship with God, other than paying my dues at church every weekend.
Thankfully, over time this all changed. I mean I wouldn’t be writing this post if it didn’t, right?
Through the help of my amazing household heads, Couple Coordinators and friends in the community I eventually feel madly in love with God and my faith. Alleluia!
Now back to the relevance of this song – The reason why this song sparked so many emotions out of me was because it perfectly outlines how I feel about God, and reminds me of how faithful He has been to me all these years, even before joining the community. Here’s how; line by line:
“No one told me, I was going to find you.”
When I joined CFC-Youth 10 years ago, I did not think that I would find God. I mean, I thought I “found” Him already! I was baptized, did my First Communion and whenever my Confirmation was, I already knew I was going to say yes to it.
Now fast forward to few years later, I can definitely see where I was wrong and this time I can proudly say that I have re-found God, f’realz. I have found Him through reading scripture, attending mass besides on Sundays, by going to adoration, and through the people in this community. As someone who formerly felt as if God was a stranger in her life, I am so happy to report that He is now my best-friend and the first person I go to for anything.
Unexpected what You did to my heart.
Since joining the community, God has not only captured my heart but He stretched it as well. He has allowed me to love in BIG ways and at times, has asked me to love those who are quite difficult to love. I think it is normal for our hearts to get broken, be it with our families, our friends or a significant other and although I’ve had my share of experiencing this, God has filled in the cracks. This in turn has made my heart more forgiving, more understanding and more vulnerable to accepting His grace and love for me! I finally have a great relationship with God and feel extremely blessed to be pursued by Him every day.
When I lost hope, You were there to remind me. This is the start.
As much as I have experienced many joys in this community and with God, there have also been many times where it was hard to see, hear or feel Him working in my life. As you get older, you start to have many questions and sometimes when you don’t get the answers you want this can cause problems of resentment, anger and hurt. I have definitely felt all these things and have lost hope in myself and in God. However, God is SO good because every time I felt this way He reminded me that He loves me and that He will never leave my side. Dang, am I blessed or what?!
I honestly love this song so much and thank God for speaking to me through the lyrics. By hearing these words, I was brought back to all the times God has been faithful to me. From attending my first youth camp, to my first household, to my first worship and so forth – God has been spoiling me every since! And even though I only joined the community 10 years ago, I know that God was right there at the beginning praying for me and loving me through and through.
To God be the Glory! Amen.
Danielle Lape
P.S. Please listen to this song when you get the chance: https://youtu.be/EgqXg9qPefE