Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
How could I not be happy when we are in the Easter season. No, I’m not talking about all the chocolate eggs that will start to go on sale soon. Nor am I relieved that I don’t have to feel as guilty for not always sticking to my Lenten fast (by the way I did relatively good this year, the important thing is that I did not give up!)
In fact, based on the secular world views, I shouldn’t have a reason to be happy. I am currently unemployed almost a full year out of university, I have a student loan to magically pay off, I live at home with my parents, had unexplained incapacitating migraines, don’t have that summer bod readiness, I am single, and my instagram is not aesthetically pleasing.
However, in all my “struggles” and challenges, I have found the Lord showing me His ways and asking me to follow Him. (This is where you stop reading if you only want the short version)
Money
Despite not being gainfully employed (my parent’s favorite term to use), I have been blessed financially where I am not completely drowning in as much debt as I should potentially be. Praise God for my parents helping provide the basics and more for me. Though I constantly find myself having to say “no” to going out with friends because I am broke; I know I am not actually broke. If I have even $1 to my name, I know I am blessed because I have more money than some families in other parts of the world. And while you might argue that $1 in a first world country means nothing, it means everything when I have it on top of having my basic shelter, food, water and clothing needs met. This is something I am very aware of, so even though I would debate if I could spend $5 at a fast food restaurant for myself, there is no hesitation when it comes to buying a meal or a cup of coffee for a homeless person. Why? Because I am already taken care of, not just by my parents, but by God. I have full trust and faith that God will always provide for me; in the moments when I truly need money – there will be an odd job, a long-lost government check or forgotten birthday card with $20 (I kid you not, this is how I have been surviving all of 2018 thus far!)
Faith
My family and friends generally describe me as a busy person. It’s funny, being out of school and not really employed I thought this would change. It hasn’t. I don’t know how I am constantly busy at times, there’s just always something to do. What I’ve come to realize is that it’s not necessarily how much you do in a day, rather it’s what you do with your days that matters. I have no excuse not to go to daily mass now (and yes, I do fail some days), but since attending daily mass, I was able to hear the Lord speaking to me through scripture and through the homilies. In addition I have been able to go to weekly adoration at my local parish. I go at odd hours during the day because I like when I’m practically the only one, one-on-one, with the Lord. It also breaks my heart to think that Jesus may be left alone (He never is, but then I think that someone might be there for a long time with no bathroom break, genuine concern). Adoration used to be daunting because I never knew what to do, what to say, how to act or be… and I can be very awkward at times, which does not help. However the Lord called me to be with Him physically through exposed Eucharistic adoration. Each time I go, the experience is different. Yes, there might be times where you feel and hear nothing. But how can you be in a relationship with someone if you never spend time with them? Even if it’s just in awkward silence, trust that the Lord appreciates your presence with Him and He will work on/with you while you are with Him.
“The disciples of Jesus recounted what had taken place along the way and how they had come to recognize him in the breaking of bread…” – Luke 24: 35
Looking at today’s gospel, which comes from Luke 24:35-48, the first verse alone affirms me of where I am in life. I am able to be happy in all things because I am looking back at what I have been through, this year alone, and I have come to recognize Jesus’s presence through it all.
Love
Being single is not a struggle or a challenge per se. Yes, I am human and despite my lack of outward emotional expressions at times, I do get crushes too. But being single in this stage of my life has been one of the biggest blessings. In fact, I don’t feel ways about being single because I feel the pursuit of Christ for me. Jesus literally died for me, and for you, which we just spent 40 days (Lent) praying and contemplating about! Why did He do it? For love. Our love. He loved me so much He died for me, to forgive me for my sins that I may have Eternal life with Him and the Father. All this before I even knew Him, but He knew me and already loved me so completely to the point of death. So how could I not even try to get to know the one who loves me. It’s not a perfect relationship (I slack on my end at times), but it is one that deserves my full attention right now and I am full heartily content giving my undivided love to Christ. In fact, not just content, I am happy.
"I've got dreams that keep me up in the dead of night, telling me I wasn't made for the simple life. ...I'm asking you to show me some forgiveness. It's all for you in my pursuit of happiness" - Happiness, NEEDTOBREATHE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3fyMc0rErCI
In Christ,
Meagan Webb